Category: Selfcare with Littles

Practical Ways to Care for Yourself During Postpartum

Listen to the companion podcast episodes HERE.

It’s my hope that this post will serve as a guide to caring for yourself during early postpartum and beyond.

I hope that it will help you or a mama you know reclaim this precious season and take the time to recover, heal and adjust.

I hope that it will make your entrance into motherhood (whether it’s the first or seventh time) a sacred time of true soul, mind and body self-care.

My Postpartum Experiences

I’ve had three very different birth experiences so far.

My first was a homebirth that ended in a transfer to the hospital. My second was at a birth center. And my third was a home birth/water birth that was absolutely amazing.

Just as I’ve had three different birth experiences, I’ve also had three different postpartum experiences. I don’t expect the fourth (coming soon!) to be any different.

Unlike birth plans that may have to be completely thrown out the window, I believe we have a little more control over our postpartum experience. A little thought and preparation can go a long way in amplifying our recovery, healing and adjustment. Each of my postpartum experiences have gotten progressively better as I’ve learned better how to care for myself in that precious season.

Observing and honoring early postpartum and the 4th Trimester (those first 12 weeks) is so very important. Yet, it’s something we woefully neglect as a society. So many other cultures observe this beautiful season, but in the Western world we seem to have forgotten about supporting the mother through this vulnerable time of recovering, healing and adjustment.

The baby gets so much focus, care and attention after birth. That’s as it should be. But I know from personal experience I put exponentially much more time and thought and money into prepping for my firstborn…and I hardly even considered what I would need for recovery, healing and adjusting during the postpartum season.

I rushed into motherhood like I had to prove that I was “okay,” that I could handle it.

Like staying in bed with my new baby to recover, heal and adjust was a sign of weakness.

Like pushing myself too far, too fast was a sign of strength and capability.

But it wasn’t. All the lies I believed about “keeping up” and getting back in shape and returning to normal were detrimental to my soul, mind and body as a new mother.

It’s my hope we can rediscover the beauty of the postpartum season. To take that time not only to bond with our baby and learn how to care for a new precious life, but also to care for ourselves in deep and needed ways that will pave the way for a smoother transition into a new season.

Specific Ways I’m Preparing for Early Postpartum

First, I’m going to be sharing what I am doing to prepare for postpartum this fourth time. I’ll be sharing many resources and tips that I’ve discovered through my first three experiences.

Most of what I will share are my tried and trues. Some are brand-new to me. With each baby I up my postpartum game because I learn something new each time.

Here are some specific ways I’m preparing for postpartum:

Pre-Gaming the Self-Care

Before my third baby I saw another mama share about how she layered on self-care during the last few weeks before baby. I LOVED that idea. Those final weeks can feel so long and uncomfortable. I determined that I was going to make the most of them, too.

Here are some ways I like to pre-game my self-care:

  • Go get or give myself a mani/pedi
  • Get out alone
  • Nap as much as possible
  • Schedule mama dates with a couple good friends
  • Take long baths
  • Get a pre-natal massage and/or go to the chiro

It doesn’t have to be anything fancy or expensive. Just those little extras that will be difficult to do once a newborn arrives.

Cozi-fying our bedroom

I’m creating a tea/coffee/snack station out of a coffee table we have in our room. You could set up a simple bar cart or even use a dresser for this. I’m getting clear trays to protect surfaces and keep everything organized. I’m planning to have a French press, electric kettle and frother. I have baskets for my teas, coffee, drink ingredients and nutrient dense snacks.

A sweet friend gifted me a small refrigerator she no longer needed and I’ve been doing a happy dance ever since. It’s going to be in our bedroom to the left of the coffee table. I’ll stock creamer, Daydream Dessert, special drinks, quick snacks, and any tonics and refrigerated supplements in there for easy access. Have I mentioned how excited I am for this!?

We replaced old, leaky shower heads, a broken vent/fan and I got a new, cozy bath rug.

I’m getting a tray for my bedside table for the daily re-fuels of healing drinks, foods, supplements, etc.

I got an under the bed wire basket to keep all the baby things close at hand. I plan to use our bed as the changing station so that I don’t have to go anywhere.

I got a small basket for nursing supplies to keep beside my bed and one for the back of the toilet to keep all my immediate postpartum supplies.

We’re moving the TV into our room, what can I say. Watching HGTV and Food Network PLUS all the Christmas movies during those long newborn nursing sessions sounds amazing.

Setting Up Help Where I Need It

My mom, bless her and thank the Lord for her, comes for a few weeks when I have my babies. It’s amazing and I will be forever grateful for the HUGE part she’s played in my postpartum recoveries. If you don’t have a close family member who is able to come, definitely check into hiring a postpartum doula. I realize this is an extra expense, but even if you only have that one-on-one help for the first couple of weeks, it will make an immense difference.

I have asked our babysitters to come once a week for an afternoon for the foreseeable future. I might double that after the holidays and my mom is gone and my husband is back at work. I plan to use this time to nap with baby, sneak in a bath or long shower, basically for #soulmindbodyselfcare.

I’ve found a house cleaning company and plan to have them come at least once a month, possibly more for a little while. They’ve already done a deep clean and it was the first time my house has been clean all at once in…forever. It was so nice. I rest best in tidy, calm surroundings. Since I know this about myself (and know that I will otherwise be tempted to be cleaning when I should be resting), this is a needed act of self-care.

I’m setting up a few meal delivery services (and getting a deep freezer for the garage). I like Hungry Root and I’m going to try Daily Harvest and Splendid Spoon. None of these are sponsored. And I’ll let you know how I like them after I’ve tried them this time. I’m thrilled to have options for clean, healthy, healing foods that will be quick to prepare, especially once I’m flying solo during the days.

I have all my essentials on subscription so that they come right to my door. Then I don’t have to remember to order something I need/use regularly in those blurry newborn days. This includes: diapers/wipes, household supplies, needed supplements, our CSA box, etc.

Taking a Baby Sleep Course

My first baby was an average sleeper. My second was not a sleeper unless she was attached to me. My third was a total dream baby/fluke, the best sleeper ever and I am spoiled. I’m not expecting a repeat, ha, so I’m preparing by taking a baby sleep course.

I’ve never been a proponent of sleep training. I like to have my babies with me for the first six months at least and then in our room (or large walk-in closet) for as long as needed. I also don’t want to jeopardize my milk supply by night weaning early.

So, I’m currently working my way through Taking Cara Babies First Five Months Bundle. So far it seems to be a very gentle approach and breast-feeding friendly. So reassuring and easy to follow while also opening my eyes to some missteps I made with my second born who did not want to sleep unless attached to me.

Whatever kind of sleeper this fourth babe is, I will feel a lot more at ease knowing I have a ton of sleep tools to employ if/when needed. I’ll let you know how it goes after I’ve had ample time to apply what I’m learning.

Planning to Take the Full 4th Trimester Off

This is so, so important. Our society has led us to believe that postpartum is just the first 6 weeks post-baby.

Nope.

Nothing could be farther from the truth. Certainly those first six weeks are integral, but observing the full 4th Trimester (those first 12 weeks) is key to long term recovery, healing and adjustment as mothers. And it shouldn’t end there. My mom has always said, it took 9 months to grow the baby, give yourself at least 9 months to recover, heal and adjust. Amen! And, personally, I always start feeling more like myself closer to the 12-16 month mark.

I take the full 4th Trimester off by:

Not putting any pressure on myself to work out or “get my body back,” even once I’m technically cleared to do so. I do TVA/deep core breathing exercises, walks and maybe some gentle stretching. That’s it. Even beyond those 12 weeks, I really listen to my body. Intense work outs right out of the gate can really tax the adrenals, especially if you haven’t replenished your stores, balanced your hormones and if you’re not getting adequate restorative sleep.

Not planning anything. Seriously. I don’t plan anything. Especially for the first month, but even the second two months, I don’t schedule regular events or play dates or anything that would take us out of the house unless we feel up to it. The big idea is: nothing on the calendar or my to do list beyond taking care of myself and my babies for those first 12 weeks.

I’m going to be pulling back here and on Instagram and the podcast and my email list. Basically taking maternity leave, but coming and going as I feel up to it. I don’t have any hard and fast goals. No pressure to show up or produce. I love what I share through Soul Mind Body Selfcare, it’s part of who I am, but I really want to take the 4th Trimester to tune in, do some learning (courses and books, etc), rest my mind and allow my inspiration to be refreshed.

Also, a little note: once postpartum, always postpartum. We can’t really put a time frame on postpartum recovery. If you didn’t have a good postpartum season with your baby(ies), whether it was a year ago or ten years ago – it’s not too late! It’s never too late to start caring for yourself. Start now, start today with your recovery, healing and adjusting. You can still apply many of the things I’m sharing in this article. At some point, I will also be talking about what I do later in the postpartum to continue the wave of recovery, healing and adjusting.

Specific Items I’m Prepping + Stocking for Postpartum

What I’m Prepping + Stocking for Right After Birth + Early Postpartum

  • A first meal. Whether it’s in the crockpot or freezer so it can be quickly warmed, I love to have something that is protein and carb heavy. My last two babies I’ve had a lasagna/pasta dish as my first meal and it just tasted so good. My first baby I had saltine crackers because the hospital cafeteria wasn’t open at 2am. Bleh.
  • After Ease by WishGarden for after birth pains (mine have gotten worse with each baby).
  • Arnica Montana 30x pellets and cream. For pain relief, sore muscles (bruised tailbone, anyone???) post birth.
  • Depends for the first several days and then comfy “grandma” underwear with every size pad (I like the brand Rael) for after that.
  • Several sets of cozy, nursing friendly pajamas and a kimono/robe.
  • Lots of quick grab, high quality snacks. I’m thinking: Perfect Bars, protein balls, macadamia nuts, dried fruit, etc.
  • Tucks pads for swelling and hemorrhoids. I place these on top of my pad and just replace as needed. I prefer this and perineal spray to “padsicles.”
  • Large water bottle to stay hydrated (I love my 40oz hydroflask) and my sole water to boost electrolytes and minerals.
  • A good, non-toxic heat pack for after birth pains (I love mine from Handmade Heat).
  • Earth Mama Herbal sitz bath. I have an actual sitz bath for my toilet, but you can also sit in a shallow tub of water or add a larger amount of herbs if you prefer a full soak. Side note: this is also lovely for mama/baby bonding and (clear with your provider), but I soak with my babies even before their umbilical cord stump falls off, the herbs are so healing and soothing.
  • Earth Mama perineal spray. I swear by this stuff. I get 2-3 bottles. It’s so healing without any yucky chemicals.
  • Gaia Herbs natural laxative. Trying this out this time. I wanted something natural and gentle, but I definitely need laxative help in those first few weeks.

Items I’m Stocking Specifically for Breastfeeding:

  • A latch assist – new to me – and I’m actually using this now to prepare. My midwife said it’s best to start using it around 33-34 weeks so it does take a little forethought.
  • Nipple shield for the first week or so, until we establish a solid latch.
  • Medela Breast shells to keep the bra pads from sticking and allow the air to circulate around the nipple between feedings – new to me but I’m willing to try anything that makes those first weeks easier.
  • La Vie Lactation Massager for plugged ducts. Also new to me, but I had the worst time with plugged ducts with my last baby. I’m going to be addressing that in other ways this time as well, but want to have this on hand, too.
  • Haakaa silicone manual breast pump for catching let downs and middle of the night pump seshs in those early weeks when my milk comes in. A few notes: I have always used the Medela Harmony Manual Breast Pump and really like it. I’m intrigued by the Haakaa because it has less parts to keep clean and uses suction which will be amazing if it actually works for me. I’ve never used an electric pump. I don’t try to build a stash. I’ll maybe end up with 6-8 bags of milk in the freezer from those first weeks while my milk is regulating. I keep those on hand for when the kids or my husband want to help feed the baby or if I’m out a bit past nursing time at some point in those first months. But I find it’s easier to simply nurse and not worry about pumping or building a stash. I know not every mama can take that approach, but that’s been my story.
  • I make a simple saline soak to soothe cracked or irritated nipples. I’ve used this method the last two babies and it really works to heal up nipples quickly.
  • Lasinoh bra pads and some washable ones a friend gifted me.
  • Bamboobies Soothing Nursing Pillows for engorgement or any kind of discomfort.
  • Wild Carrot calendula nipple whip. Healing and soothing between nursing sessions.

What Herbs/Supplements/Foods/Drinks I’m Stocking for Postpartum:

Tonics/Teas/Herbs:

Loose leaf teas – Stinging Nettle Leaf, Red Raspberry Leaf, Dandelion Root and Lemon Balm. I love Mountain Rose Herbs to purchase these.

Milk Moon – I’m getting their postpartum restorative tonic

I will continue taking an adrenal tonic my midwife has give me, herbs to support my varicose veins (thankfully they begin to clear up in those early weeks!) and keep my homemade elderberry and echinacea tincture close at hand to keep my immune system strong.

Supplements:

ProgestPure – I was taking this natural progesterone supplement when I got pregnant and have been taking it through out my pregnancy. My cycle always returns ridiculously early, like 2-3 months pp, even though I nurse on demand. My midwife said that can sometimes be caused by low progesterone, so this time I’m going to be supplementing.

Quicksilver Methylated Liquid B complex – I am most excited about this one (if you can be excited about a supplement, ha) because I’ve never taken a B Complex during postpartum. I am so curious to see if it helps with low energy as well as postpartum hair loss.

Postnatal liquid multi from MaryRuth Organics

Postnatal probiotic from MaryRuth Organics

Grass-fed beef liver capsules, so amazing for boosting iron and B12 and supporting energy levels and overall well being.

Of course, I’ll also have my wellness arsenal stocked, too. Especially since this early postpartum season will be in the colder months.

Foods:

High quality bone broth for sipping and soup-making
Organic, local raw dairy – milk, cream, yogurt, kefir, etc
Citrus anything and everything
Root veggies and especially beets (TMI but they help me go!)
Ginger, turmeric, garlic
Day Dream Desserts

Drinks:

Ingredients for smoothies (drinking at room temp to keep my body warm to promote healthy circulation and healing)
Golden Milk paste for healing golden milk lattes
Foursigmatic hot cocoa with reishi
Live kombucha soda for that fiz with probiotics

Extra Resources + Tips for Postpartum:

Recovery, Healing and Adjusting:

Resources:

Postnatal Depletion Cure
The First 40 Days
The 4th Trimester

Tips:

Prepare as much beforehand as you possibly can. A good postpartum season isn’t going to just happen, you have to plan for it. BUT. If you are reading this while postpartum and feeling discouraged, don’t be! Start right where you are with what you have. Identify your top three needs and brainstorm with your husband how you can practically meet those needs ASAP.

Set clear boundaries with family/friends who might want to visit. Designate a gate keeper at the hospital and/or at home. Put a sign on the front door saying “Mama and baby are resting, thanks for stopping by, we will be in touch soon,” or something to that affect. Communicate your desires clearly with your husband and anyone else who will be caring for you. Decide how much time you need undisturbed (one day? one week? one month?) If people want to bring food or gifts, tell them thank you and to please leave it on the door step unless you are up for visiting. If people do come in for a visit, have a list of things that need to be done so that when they ask how they can help, you don’t have to think. Above all, do what you need to do in order to prioritize your recovery and bonding with baby. Be kind but firm. Don’t be afraid to say no. You don’t owe anyone anything.

A few more…

  • Have a plan to focus on replenishing nutrients, balancing hormones and adequately support your adrenals.
  • Keep the lymphatic and detox systems moving/working with: castor oil packs, dry brushing, acupuncture, sauna, chiro, massage, etc. Have care providers and contact info ready to go and appointments established/scheduled if you are able.
  • Nancy Anderson’s Ab Rehab and TVA breathing exercises. See a pelvic floor specialist if you have persistent issues. Better to take care of things early on, but even years postpartum you can heal!

Breastfeeding:

Resources:

The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding
Guide to Breastfeeding (and any videos by Dr. Jack Newman on YouTube)
La Leche League
KellyMom.com

Tips:

Even after nursing babies for 60 months collectively (WHAT?!), I still feel like a novice. Especially when it comes to nursing newborns. I like to say, I’m great at nursing toddlers, but I suck at nursing newborns. Ha. When they’re totally dependent, don’t know what the heck they’re doing (feeling the same, babes, feeling the same), need you to support their body completely while you’re sleep deprived and exhausted… It’s just a lot.

So, my #1 tip would be to be prepared and have plenty of support. Gather all your resources, stock all your supplies and line up any help you might need. Breastfeeding is natural, but it might not come naturally. It will probably take several weeks of adjustment (especially if it’s your first) and a whole lot of perseverance, hard work and dedication. It’s both the hardest and most beautiful thing I’ve ever done apart from giving birth and raising my kiddos.

Bonus tips:

Every time we have a baby, I put together what I call the big sister/big brother bag for the older sibling(s). We pull it out after the baby is born and tell them it’s our celebration of baby arriving. It makes them feel special and thought of and makes baby’s arrival fun. It helps ease the transition a little. This time I think we’re also going to get balloons and cupcakes to really do it up. Make it a birth-day party.

I put items in the bag that will help entertain the kiddos while I recover. This time I’m putting in a ton of new Christmas books, their Christmas pajamas, a washable coloring mat from The Modern Cloth with washable markers, Christmas mugs, new mini ornaments so they can decorate their tree, etc.

I like to have any info for newborn care (even after three babies, each newborn season always feels like the first time) and any appointments that need to be scheduled for me or the baby in those early weeks ready to go. It’s hard to make decisions in those early days/weeks when you’re sleep deprived. I don’t want to have to remember what to do if my baby is crying and won’t stop or who I need to call to schedule that first chiro apt, etc. I keep everything in a folder for easy access and stock any homeopathies or other remedies I might need.

Listen to the companion podcast episodes HERE.

Have any questions for me? Leave them in the comments and I’ll be happy to answer! You’ve got this, mama. Never fear! One breath, one step, one day at a time.

For more self-care goodness, join my email list. Check out the side bar (or scroll all the way down if you’re on mobile) to view all the freebies I’ve created just with you in mind. I hope you find something helpful.

Let’s care for ourselves,

Hannah

My Self-Care Journey + Four Big Lessons I’ve Learned

Listen to the companion podcast episode HERE.

We all begin our self-care journey somewhere. It’s like a lot of things in life: you might not recognize where you began – what paradigm shift or pivotal moment brought you to the starting line. But years down the road you’ll look back and go “ahhhh, that was it. The beginning.”

That was certainly true for me. I didn’t even know I was on a self-care journey until I was five years in. Looking back I can clearly see each paradigm shift.

I’d love to take you along on my journey. I want to start by defining self-care. I’m passionate about making the term self-care accessible and applicable for every mama, everywhere. For the purposes of Soul Mind Body Selfcare, here’s our working definition:

Let’s start at the beginning…

Paradigm Shift #1: The Beginning

Me with my first son. After a very long labor + traumatic birth. So in love but completely + totally overwhelmed in every way.

I didn’t know anything about self-care until after I had my first son in 2013. I had come off several stressful years in my late teens and early twenties, earning my bachelors, working two jobs, putting myself through an intense master program, getting married and having a baby in quick succession. It was a lot of stress (even though a lot of it was obviously good!) and not a lot of recovery time. I remember feeling like I was getting sick one fall while I was deep in the trenches of earning my masters. I told myself I didn’t have time and I just kept pushing forward. That’s just one example of many.

Add to that: I didn’t know how to care for myself even if I’d wanted to. Period. I didn’t know what that looked like. I treated my soul, mind and body like a machine: they did what I told it to and that meant I never really stopped.

Even after my son was born, I didn’t stop. I was up and around just a couple days after a very long, intense and traumatic birth. The midwife was horrified. I remember going to Target, my newborn in a moby wrap, way too soon because I just thought that’s what I was supposed to do. Get back to life, get back to normal.

Oh, man. I could write a book, just on that. How as a society we have lost the beautiful, vulnerable, necessary healing time that is postpartum. I had no clue. No clue what a healing postpartum season looked like. No clue that there was no getting back to my old “normal.” No clue that I had nothing to prove, no one to impress, by pushing myself too hard, too fast.

In fact, it wasn’t until I was around 15 months postpartum that everything began to catch up with me. I was still breastfeeding, had suffered an early miscarriage and my husband was away for six months going through training for a new job that would move us to the other side of the country.

It slowly starting dawning on me that: caring for my baby was only part of the motherhood equation; the other part was learning how to care for myself as well.

This was my first big, paradigm shift. The beginning of my self-care journey. I wasn’t well physically, emotionally or mentally. Our of sheer necessity, I found myself at a naturopath, trying to figure out why I felt like I was falling apart. During the two hour intake session, I ended up sharing things I’d never shared with anyone. I realized then I probably should have been in therapy long before. It was the beginning for me.

Paradigm Shift #2: A Slow Awakening

Me with my daughter. After a very emotionally charged labor and beautiful, birth center birth. I was exhausted on every level. Our postpartum season was good but way too short.

After seeing that first naturopath, I took baby steps towards addressing some physical issues I was experiencing. Skin issues, hair loss, inability to concentrate, wired but tired, prone to depression…so many things pointed to the fact my adrenals were shot. What I couldn’t know at the time was that this was only the tip of the iceberg.

I did start to feel some micro improvements, but I still didn’t have any clue what self-care was or the depth to which I needed it. I did what I could with the knowledge I had at the time. Which is all anyone can do, which is why this is called a journey.

Fast forward to six months postpartum with my daughter at the beginning of 2016. I had been through a super stressful year prior. We had moved across country for my husband’s new job, away from family. We had been through house hunting, found a place and had been working non-stop to fix it up. All while my husband worked 12 hour days and I managed the renovations. Add to that: pregnancy, wrangling a toddler, an emotionally intense delivery, extended family issues…

That time still blurs together. I was overwhelmed, stressed, not sleeping, and I still hadn’t learned what I needed to thrive, how to meet my own needs or how to ask for help. Before I had become pregnant with my daughter, I had been writing my heart out, building a blog, and an email list and I literally hit “delete” on all of it. Just like I had hit delete on all the parts of life that made me…well, me.

I hit rock bottom. I found myself at my parents for a few weeks and, for the first time, I was able to rest, to sit back while my children were cared for by others and actually see them, see myself, have space to think. That’s when I realized again that I needed help.

I found a naturopath in our new area and dove deeper into functional medicine. I still went into my first appointment with a shotgun approach, not really knowing what to ask for or what was priority. Once again I took baby steps towards caring for my physical body. I was diagnosed with candida and got on a regime to treat that. I did a Whole 30 and learned so much about eating whole foods, reading labels and how to cook a lot more things from scratch. Through that whole process I discovered my body [and my skin! It completely cleared up] did so much better without conventional dairy.

Addressing the physical was good. It brought me to a place where I could actually start thinking about what I required to thrive. How I should care for myself. What I needed most. It helped clear some of the brain fog and the nagging physical symptoms that distracted me from working on deeper issues.

The clearer mind brought me to counseling and starting to do the hard work of setting healthy boundaries. I am not by nature a strong willed person, but I became strong willed when it came to my own self-care. I learned the importance of saying no, of prioritizing myself and my family over what others thought or wanted. I realized I had to stop playing the martyr. No one could read my mind. I had to get to know myself better, understand what made me thrive, and learn to meet those needs and how to communicate them. I had to take responsibility for caring for myself.

I began practicing yoga and I fell in love with how it married movement and breath and brought restoration to not just my physical health, but my my mental health as well. I’ve been practicing yoga for almost five years now and nothing helps me feel more at home in my body or my mind faster.

Around the same time I started yoga, I embarked on a mission to not just organize our home, but completely declutter it. Get rid of everything that we didn’t love or use. Of course, my mission wasn’t quite that clear at first. I just knew that too much stuff overwhelmed me and I was tired of trying to organize it only to turn around and find it a jumbled mess two minutes later. So I started decluttering, space by space. Month by month. It’s been a journey in and of it’s self. A long learning process. Like peeling away the layers of an onion. But, truly, decluttering our home, our schedule, my expectations, my brain, everything has been a huge game changer in my self-care journey.

Paradigm Shift #3: Starting to Share My Journey

Me with my third baby, our second boy. Having him felt like coming home. He brought healing that I didn’t know I needed, on levels I didn’t know existed.

The spring my third baby was born was one of the most beautiful seasons of our life for so many reasons. We had just finished a long, arduous process of selling our house, moving to a new town, living in a rental paying double payments, battling lots of sickness (I was sick for two solid weeks before my son was born, coughing until my ribs ached, sleeping sitting straight up in bed at 9 months pregnant, ha).

My son was born, my first successful home waterbirth. It was quick and intense and beautiful. He was perfect and so was our postpartum experience thanks to all the many lessons I had learned and my mom and my husband caring for me, the kids and the house so seamlessly. I spent the first two weeks in bed with my baby and gave myself a full 12 weeks before I started any exercise beyond walking. I let my body heal and didn’t try to rush. It felt so freeing. We finally sold our house and found a new house. The cherry on top was that the baby was our best sleeper yet. It all felt like such a gift.

When my third was about nine months old, I started intentionally sharing my self-care journey on Instagram. The more I shared, the more I heard from other mamas how desperately they craved self-care but didn’t know what it looked like or how to implement it. So, I kept sharing everything I had learned and was learning and one day Soul Mind Body Selfcare was born. A few months later I started this blog so I could have a place to write that gave me more space than an Instagram caption. I’ve slowly, steadily grown my mama tribe and hope to continue growing.

Paradigm Shift #4: Self-Care Isn’t Just the Feel Good Stuff

Nursing my sweet third born for the last time. I was about to start some intensive protocols to heal my gut. I also knew deep down my body needed a good, long break.

When my third baby was about a year old, I found a local functional medicine doctor to get a proactive, head start on caring for myself postpartum. This time when I went in for my first appointment, I didn’t shotgun; I knew the questions I wanted to ask, the tests I wanted done, and where exactly I wanted to prioritize.

A series of comprehensive tests revealed/confirmed I had borderline Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis, multiple food sensitivities, leaky gut and two different gut infections. I went on a strict elimination diet for two months, cutting out several reactive foods including coffee, alcohol, eggs, yeast and gluten. I followed several different protocols to heal my leaky gut, detox my liver, support my adrenals and get rid of my gut infections. In order to do the protocols for the gut infections, I needed to wean my third baby at 16 months. Which isn’t early by any means, but he could have kept going and it made me sad not to be able to nurse him for as long as he wanted.

But sometimes self-care looks like sacrifice. During the fall and winter of 2019 I really ramped up my self-care on all the levels. I started meditating, dry brushing, visiting the sauna, using a castor oil pack, utilizing adaptogens, practicing moon cycling, getting massage, taking regular detox baths. You name it, I was doing it. We started trying for another baby and I wanted to be as healthy and strong as possible.

Of course, in January I (along with all the family) got the horrible flu that was going around. It set me way back. I didn’t feel like myself for weeks and was still dealing with lung congestion, low energy and relapses a month later. A month after that I experienced hair loss due to the stress of the sickness. Which is just amazing…I don’t even want to know what it would have done to my body if I hadn’t already been so focused on my health and self-care on every level.

A few weeks after that, in mid-March of 2020, we found out I was expecting. Not exactly how I’d hoped to step into a new pregnancy. And it so happened to be the same week of the full moon, day light savings and when all of the Covid-19 stuff hit the fan. It was an intense time on a spiritual, emotional and mental level…let alone on the physical level.

All the lessons I had learned over the previous 8 years came full circle. It felt a little like ground zero once again. Where the rubber meets the road. Almost like a new beginning of some sort. I’m still navigating it. Because this is a journey. There’s no finish line in this life and that’s okay. The beauty and growth and transformation is in the process.

Don’t forget that, mama.

Listen to the companion podcast episode HERE.

To recap, here are four big lessons I’ve learned so far on my self-care journey:

Big Lesson #1:

Addressing the physical is so necessary and might need to happen first before you can think about anything else. Healing physically will bring you to a place where you can actually start thinking about healing emotionally and mentally and deciding exactly what you require to thrive.

Big Lesson #2:

Setting boundaries is key. You have to learn to say no. You have to learn to make yourself and your immediate family priority over anything and everyone else.

Big Lesson #3:

On that note: stop playing the martyr. No one can read your mind. No one is going to magically meet your needs without you asking. Ultimately you have to take responsibility for caring for yourself. Determine what you need to thrive and then meet your needs or communicate them clearly to those who can.

Big Lesson #4:

One step at a time. One day at a time. Nothing worthwhile happens over night. It’s called a journey for a reason. There’s no medal for the first person across the finish line because there is no finish line. At least not in this world. What matters is that you are learning and growing and moving forward one step at a time.

Listen to the companion podcast episode HERE.

Have any questions for me? Leave them in the comments and I’ll be happy to answer! You’ve got this, mama. Never fear! One breath, one step, one day at a time.

For more self-care goodness, come join me on Instagram. And if you haven’t joined my email list yet, that’s a great place to find more of the same. Check out the side bar (or scroll all the way down if you’re on mobile) to view all the freebies I’ve created just with you in mind. I hope you find something helpful.

Let’s care for ourselves,

Hannah

5 Big Ways I’ve Simplified Our Every Day Life [To Create More Time for What Matters Most]

Nothing has been a bigger game changer for my life and my motherhood than finding specific ways to simplify so that I have more time (and energy) for what matters most.

These 5 things I’m about to share with you have come after nearly 8 years of motherhood. I’m hoping they will save other younger mamas lots of time and angst. Let them encourage and inspire you to make your own simple changes, too.

This isn’t an all inclusive list. What is your favorite way to simplify to create more time for the things that matter most?

Pssssst…. You can listen to the companion podcast episode HERE.

Need extra help in simplifying? Creating rhythms is so important. Grab the free guide today!

Let’s dive in…

1.) Declutter Everything

And I mean absolutely everything. All of your physical surroundings, but also your brain, your schedule, your priorities, right down to the number of tabs you have open on your computer. Everything. No man left behind.

Beyond the obvious decluttering Marie Kondo-style, here are a few ways I’ve also found to simplify my life via decluttering:

  • Toy rotation. Yes, this is even for you if you consider yourself fairly minimalist already. The basic idea is to have specific storage areas for toys. Ours are an IKEA system in the kids’ room, a cedar chest for their train set, a hall closet that contains all their art and games and puzzles and then a coat closet we’ve transformed into LEGO storage. Then each child gets a bin (right now the two boys share one) that houses “extras.” Every month or so we rotate, one for one style, so that old toys feel new again and there’s never too much down at one time. Listen to the podcast on taming the toy chaos HERE.
  • Eliminate pain points. If I find that a particular area (example: our laundry room/mud room) is causing me particular angst then I focus in there. I declutter, rearrange, rethink so that it starts working for us again.
  • Remove duplicates. I don’t have two of very many things at all. I keep my favorite, the very best and let go of the rest. The only exceptions are seasonal items.
  • Cut down on repetitive actions. One example from my personal life are throw pillows. I love a good throw pillow. But just not on our couch. I had them there for a while and found I was picking them up off the floor literally half a dozen times a day. Nope. Don’t need that in my life. So I moved them to our bed and they fit perfectly. Problem solved.

2.) Automate and Delegate

Two of my favorite words in motherhood. Ha. But truly, they are key to simplifying and saving your sanity.

Here are a few ways I apply them to every day life:

  • Get the kiddos involved. Kids love to feel needed (who doesn’t), but even if they’re not thrilled at the idea of helping, involve them anyway. I am always telling my kids, I am just one person. There are five of us in the home. We are all a team and we all have to pitch in order to be successful. We each have to do our part. My seven year old cleans the kids’ bathroom, folds laundry, empties the dishwasher, makes simple meals, pulls weeds, waters the garden, etc. My almost five year old helps with the laundry as well, emptying the dishwasher, vacuuming, pulling weeds, etc. Even my two year old puts away silverware, puts his clothes away, sweeps up small messes, etc. It may not seem like help at first, but before you know it, your kids will be helping to lighten the family load.
  • Find a reliable babysitter. I know this can feel so overwhelming. I am very picky about who watches my kids, so not just anyone will do. I start by asking someone I trust who they recommend. Word of mouth always wins for me. We currently have a sister duo who the kids love and I can trust.
  • Utilize grocery delivery or pick up. Seriously. I rarely step foot in a grocery store anymore. There’s no need to if you live in an area with grocery delivery and/or pick up options. Yesterday I had Instacart deliver groceries from my local market and Costco with in 15 minutes of each other. Fridge cleaned out, restocked, done for the week. Praise.
  • Set up intentional subscriptions. I used to resist them, but now they are my best friend. The trick is only setting up subscriptions for items and services that you already use on the regular. If you find you’re not using it, simply cancel. I keep a running list of my current subscriptions so I can monitor them. Here are some of my tried and trues: Branch Basics for non-toxic cleaning supplies, Butcher Box for the best meat, my local CSA for fresh, seasonal veggies, fruits, dairy, and baked goods, Honest Company for diapers and wipes, Mary Ruth’s Organics for amazing supplements for the entire family.
  • Automatic bill pay. Not much more to say here. I have all our bills set to automatically withdraw. I still get paper statements and review them, but don’t have to worry about missing payment deadlines.
  • Invest in a robot vacuum. I mean, you can invest in a house cleaner, too. I just haven’t made that leap yet because I honestly find cleaning therapeutic AND it’s hard to find a house cleaner who will use my non-toxic products. SO, a robot vacuum is one of my biggest hacks (besides the one load, one space rhythm). I’ve had this basic robot vacuum for almost two years now and it is still going strong. I run it a few times a week and am always amazed how much it picks up.

3.) Create Rhythms

This is a constant refrain of mine, but for good reason. Rhythms have completely changed my motherhood for the better.

Here’s why: they provide a flexible framework for each day, week, month, season so that I can stop reinventing the wheel.

I’ve written in depth about rhythms and share how to create them HERE.

4.) Don’t Over Think Meal Time

As mamas, planning, prepping and providing meals for our family is a huge part of our day to day life. So, I’ve done my very best to simplify the process as much as possible.

Here are a few ways I do that:

  • I make a meals idea list at the start of each week. I list seven breakfasts and seven dinner ideas based on what I have in the fridge and pantry. Generally it’s the same basic seasonal meals on rotation. I might throw in a new recipe now and then. If I do, I pull from my Food + Drink Board on Pinterest. This gives me the flexibility of choosing what I make on any given day, but I have the framework of “what” already laid out.
  • Lunches around here are almost always “board style.” Meaning: I grab a cutting board, pull out all the random odds and ends in the fridge and create a mix of healthy fats, protein, and carbs. Super simple. No plates. Everyone is happy.
  • I use a meal delivery service. I’ve been trying out Hungry Root for a week each month (not sponsored). I plan to use them more heavily during postpartum. I get a box with basic ingredients for 2-3 breakfasts, dinners and snacks, high quality ingredients that I would normally choose. It’s really helped simplify the whole meal process and takes a load off my “plate.” Ha.
  • I do my best to focus on simple, high quality ingredients. You can make a pasta with olive oil, olives, tomatoes, parm and Italian sausage taste like a $20 meal if you use really good ingredients. Even a salad tastes world class when made with simple, high quality ingredients. Don’t over think it. Buy what’s in seasons, buy local. Don’t get locked into the main course, side dishes, three hours of prep mentality.

5.) Capsule Wardrobes for All

Seriously. This has simplified my life in so many ways. And capsule wardrobes don’t have to mean only a certain number or items. Or all neutral. Or that you wear the same three things every day of the week. It can look however you need and want it to look.

For me, capsule wardrobes has significantly cut down on the amount of laundry we have for five people. They have cut down on decision fatigue because we only have what we love and actually wear.

I find my kids gravitate to the same few pieces just like I do. So capsule wardrobes just make so much sense.

I talk more about capsule wardrobes and how to build one HERE.

And I can’t not share my favorite clothing companies that focus on the capsule approach:

For Mama

For Kiddos

Listen to the companion podcast episode HERE.

Go check out other episodes of The Self-Care Sessions.

For more self-care goodness, come join me on Instagram.

If you haven’t joined my email list yet, that’s a great place to find more of the same.

Grab my Rhythms Guide for FREE and get started on creating your own today!

Let’s care for ourselves,

Hannah

Why + How I’m Stocking My Winter Wellness Arsenal

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I could talk about this topic all day long. Truly. If you’d like to listen to the podcast episode related to this blog post, hop over here.

Stocking a winter wellness arsenal does take a little bit of planning, but it’s well worth the effort IMO. I love knowing that I have the tools I need to care for my family year around (leave a comment if you’d like a separate post on that!), but especially in the cooler months when our immune systems might otherwise take a little hit from lack of sunshine, more time spent indoors and cold + flu season ramping up.

In this post, I’ll be sharing why I stock a winter wellness arsenal and then how I stock it – what I’m making, products I’m sourcing and resources I’m utilizing to prepare for the cooler months ahead.

Why

Having a fully stocked wellness arsenal allows me to support my family’s health on a daily basis, prevent (proactive care is key!) and – when necessary – effectively address many common illnesses from the comfort of home.

It’s empowering. And we should feel empowered in this area, mamas. We know our families best. We know our children best. And there are so many natural remedies that are powerful and effective – several that use ingredients you might already have in your pantry or fridge.

This is not a knock against doctors or modern medicine. Both have their necessary and needed place. But I personally believe that place is predominantly for acute care.

When it comes to supporting my family’s health on a daily basis through preventative care measures and offering support during illnesses that simply must run their course, I love that I am able to be confident and prepared. You can be, too, mama. No degree or license required.

How

I have slowly expanded my winter wellness arsenal over the last few years. As I’ve gathered knowledge and confidence and I’ve found what works best for my family. Disclaimer: Please don’t take anything I’m saying here as gospel. Do your own research. Find what works best for your family. Keep asking questions, searching for the answers and never stop learning.

This past January everyone in my little fam got a horrible strain of the flu. I have never been that sick before, except for maybe an intense sinus infection in my teen years. I was down for about a week and it took me a few more weeks to feel like myself again. Through that experience I was able to test my winter wellness arsenal and found some great things to add to it as well.

This year I’m trying several new-to-me remedies. I plan to give them a go and see which ones work best for us, then repeat the tried and trues next year and leave the rest.

  • 4 Thieves Vinegar
  • Chamomile Tincture
  • Fermented Honey + Garlic

This is what I’m making to have on hand this year:

Quick note: most of the following recipes need to sit and “cure” for 4-6 weeks for best results. That’s why I talk about having to plan ahead a little bit. Starting now (late August/early September) will ensure you have what you need before the cooler weather hits.

Elderberry Syrup – An immune tonic that is full of flavonoids, potassium and Vitamin A and C. Easy to make and keeps well in the fridge. I give it as a preventative Oct-Mar a few times a week and up the dosage to twice a day at the first sign of illness. This is one remedy I’ve been using for a few years now and it is fantastic. I can personally attest to it’s benefits and will always have this in my winter wellness arsenal.

Fermented honey and garlic – A powerhouse duo! Both raw honey and garlic are superstars when it comes to immune support, prevention of illness and shortening the duration of an illness. This year is my first time making this combo, but I’ve been using both ingredients separately for years with great success.

Raw honey is soothing for sore throats while providing anti-viral anti-bacterial properties along with many amino acids, minerals, prebiotics and enzymes. If local raw honey is used, it’s also wonderful as an anti-allergen. It’s just an all around superfood.

Garlic is also anti-viral and anti-bacterial. It’s high in allicin which is produced when fresh garlic is crushed. This compound can prevent oxidative stress, may prevent some cancers and is an anti-inflammatory.

I plan to use this as needed for both prevention (if you don’t like the idea of eating it by the spoonful, I read it makes a tasty dressing or marinade) and during any bouts of illness. Overall, it was just super simple to make so I figured why not?!

Chamomile tincture – A gentle tonic that promotes relaxation, sleep, calms nerves and can assist with pain relief (think: teething and headaches). This one is new to me as well, although chamomile is not; I’ve been drinking the tea for a long time. And I just happened to have a big bag of loose, dried flowers so I thought I’d give this one a shot. I plan to use it in place of Tylenol whenever possible (saving that as a last resort).

Echinacea tincture + tea – A wonderful preventive and/or remedy that boosts the immune system, aids in respiratory issues, can reduce infections (think: ear infections and yeast infections), reduces inflammation and can provide pain relief.

I have used echinacea in both tincture and tea form for years, though more regularly as apart of my winter wellness arsenal beginning last year. I actually grew an echinacea plant this year (yay, me for keeping it alive! Ha) so I used fresh flowers and leaves/stems in my tincture. I dried a portion as well to crush and use for tea.

Echinacea is not recommended for long term/on going use. I only give it at the first sign of illnesses and try to taper off after a week, giving a break and then dosing again for a few days as needed.

4 Thieves Vinegar – Immune boosting and anti-microbial mutli-purpose tonic. This blend is super easy to make and can be taken for preventative care or immune system support at first sign of illness. This will be my first year using this, so I’m excited to see how it works.

I plan to dose similar to Elderberry Syrup, but probably only at first signs of illness. I’ve read to take it with raw honey as an added boost (will use my fermented garlic honey). This can also be used topically for skin irritations. As well as a surface disinfectant; just pour the strained liquid into an amber bottle with a spray top and use like an all-purpose cleaner. It’s worth a try!

Here’s what I already have on hand:

  • Fresh ginger, garlic, onions + lemons
  • Vitamin D3/K2 drops
  • Echinacea/Goldenseal tincture (a little left over from last year)
  • Sovereign Silver – I use this as a preventive immune boost, but also on cuts or skin irritations, rashes, etc. I’ve even read you can diffuse it, definitely trying that this winter. It’s just an all around awesome remedy to have on hand.
  • WishGarden “Get Over It” – found this during our flu bout in January when I was on my second week not feeling well. I think it really, really helped give me that extra “oomph” I needed to start feeling like myself again.
  • Essential oils (for diffusing and using topically): peppermint, eucalyptus, sweet orange

A month-by-month approach to stocking up.

I am taking a month-by-month approach to stocking up and I’m guessing that’s probably the best approach budget-wise for most mamas out there. While caring for our families doesn’t have to break the bank, it is an investment. I like taking it a little at a time. That allows me to reasonably fit it into our budget and also allows me time to consider what I really want and need.

A note on the month-by-month approach for 2020: I front loaded my most wanted items because it’s hard to know how supply and distribution lines will look in the coming months with the election craziness and any October surprises. That would be my only word of warning. When everything hit the fan in March many of the products and companies I’m going to share sold out very fast and were weeks behind in shipping.

Here’s what I’m planning to purchase over the next three months:

September

  • These immune gummies – we’re going to be traveling + these are so convenient. I also like to have them during the months when I’m not making elderberry syrup.
  • Bee Keeper’s Naturals family defense pack – good all the time and especially in the winter months but also amazing for travel.
  • Some sort of electrolyte boost for travel and for any illnesses that may arise. I’m still researching to find the cleanest one out there.
  • Essential oils: lavender, cedar, clove bud, tea tree
  • More ginger, garlic, onions + lemons

October

  • Rocky Mountain throat syrup – this is another product I discovered during our January bout with the flu and it is the only natural cough syrup that really works IMO. One dose and my kiddos and I were able to sleep without hacking.
  • Oils: thyme, pine, grapefruit
  • Vitamin C drops or gummies
  • Ionic Zinc drops
  • More ginger, garlic, onions, lemons and add fresh turmeric root

November

  • Glutathione – an awesome immune support, reduces oxidative stress, aids the liver, improves sleep, and helps with respiratory issues. I prefer to take the liposomal version.
  • Vitamin D3/K2 as needed
  • Orthomolecular Sinatrol – this is something new I want to have on hand this year because I’ve heard great things about it. From their company: “Helps support microflora balance, promotes normal mucus viscosity for healthy sinus function, and promotes a balanced inflammatory response.” I struggled with multiple sinus infections in my teens so I do my best to lower inflammation and support my sinus when I do get sick now.
  • Essential oils: lemon, cinnamon, cypress
  • More sovereign silver as needed
  • More fresh ginger, garlic, onions, lemons and fresh turmeric as needed

Never forget that food is medicine. And while genes are part of the equation, lifestyle largely determines how our genes express themselves. I would be remiss to not mention this point. I’m pretty sure if you’ve been around here long at all, you know I believe diet and lifestyle are the first line of defense when it comes to wellness. The food we are putting in our body, the products we’re putting on our body, etc, are paramount. We have to address those before natural remedies, supplements, and vitamins are going to do us any good.

Here are some of my current favorite resources that have helped me in building my winter wellness arsenal:

Books:

Rosemary Gladstar’s Medicinal Herbs: A Beginner’s Guide – this book kept rising to the top in all my research so I snagged it. And I’m so glad! It’s an easy read, but very detailed and helpful at the same time. I can tell it will be a book I reference for years to come.

Mommy Diagnostics (The Art of Taking Care of Your Family) – my midwife loans out her library and I just happened to grab this one. I’m so glad I did! It’s fantastic. Honestly, it’s really hard to find and super pricey. I found a copy for around $50 and snagged it because I really feel it’s just that good and a resource I will be returning to again and again. I wanted it on my shelf.

My Pinterest board Herbalism + Homeopathy – where I’m pinning all the winter wellness arsenal goodness. That’s were you’ll find all the recipes I return to again and again, as well as all the new ones I’m trying out.

Mary Ruth’s Organics – this company is one of my top choices when it comes to high quality supplements for my family.

iHerb – this is a new-to-me company and, so far, I love their selection. The minimum for free shipping is super low, shipping is fast and I haven’t had any problem with anything I’ve received. Ultimately, as convenient as Amazon is, I prefer to find alternate methods of purchasing wellness items, including going directly to the companies themselves.

Mountain Rose Herbs – one of my top resources for all things herbs, essential oils, natural remedies and other household supplies (think: beeswax candles). The only downside is they are 2-3 weeks behind in shipping so keep that in mind when ordering. I do love their sourcing and quality and will continue to purchase from them as needed.

There you have it, an overview of why + how I’m stocking our winter wellness arsenal this year. Has this post been helpful? If so, please pin and share and let me know in the comments!

Don’t forget to tune into the podcast episode on the subject.

Or check out other episodes of The Self-Care Sessions.

For more self-care goodness, come join me on Instagram.

If you haven’t joined my email list yet, that’s a great place to find more of the same.

Now you can download The Soul Mind Body Selfcare Guide: 30 Ways to Start Caring For Yourself When You Don’t Know Where to Start for FREE.

Let’s care for ourselves,

Hannah

Disclaimer: I am not a doctor. Everything health + wellness I share here is based on my own personal experience and research. Be your own advocate, mama. Search, ask, dig. Research and find the answers you need. You are worth it.

6 Ways to Make Time for Self-Care With Littles at Home [+ Tips for Keeping Them Happy When You Need Some Peace]

Self-care has never been more important. The harder the times, the tighter the squeeze, the higher the pressure – the more we need #soulmindbodyselfcare.

Now is not the time to skimp on caring for ourselves. But I know, mama, you might be asking: how??? How do I layer on the self-care when I have my kids with me all day.

Luckily, I’ve spent the last several years dialing down on this. I’ve got three babies (+ a fourth on the way!) at home with me every day, and I have learned how to care for myself in consistent, tangible, life-changing ways. It can be done.

In fact, it’s become my mission to redefine self-care and help as many mamas as I can care for themselves well.

So, let’s dive into 6 ways you can care for yourself with littles at home…

1.) Think in 5-10 minute increments sprinkled throughout the day.

Maybe you’re used to working with larger chunks of time. I know I’ve been used to getting out every Saturday for several hours alone and that’s not really happening right now. It’s been an adjustment, but I’ve just added in several more pockets of self-care into my days.

So, instead of thinking you need two consecutive hours alone, take that two hours and break it down into 5-10 minute increments you sprinkle throughout your day.

Here are some of mine:

My morning skincare routine (5 minutes)
Making and drinking a warm drink (10 minutes)
Sitting in the sunshine while the kids play (10 minutes)
Yoga or a HIIT workout (10 minutes, 2 x’s a day)
Brain dump (5 minutes)
Read a chapter (5 minutes)

Bonus: by approaching self-care in this way, you’ll effectively log way more time caring for yourself on a day-to-day basis than you would trying to fit in big chunks of time every once in a while. A little goes a long way.

2.) Ask your husband for help.

This one seems like a no-brainer, but I think it’s probably the most underutilized. I know it was for me for years. I didn’t know how to ask for help. I thought asking for help meant I was failing. I also thought that if I had to ask for help, spell it out, maybe my husband didn’t really care for me.

After 8 years of marriage and almost as many of motherhood, I’ve learned that asking for help is necessary to my well-being and the well-being of my family. I’ve learned that just because I ask for help doesn’t mean I’m failing. In fact, it shows I’m growing and learning and that I’m strong enough to admit I can’t do everything on my own. I’ve learned that (news flash) men and women are wired differently. Just because your husband doesn’t jump in and do things before you ask doesn’t mean he doesn’t care; it means he’s human and he can’t read your mind.

Remember: ask your husband for help and ask often. It’s okay to spell out what you need! I think most men appreciate not being left to guess at details. Be calm, be clear and tell him how thankful you are for his help. Over time, he’ll adjust to the rhythms, too, and I think you’ll find him jumping in without being asked. At this point in marriage and parenthood, my husband and I are more of a team than ever. We tag team through the days: I’ll cook and he does the dishes. I wrangle kiddos in the morning, he’ll take over bath time.

Bonus: don’t just stop with your husband. Ask your mom for help, your mother-in-law, your sister, a close friend. And delegate to grocery delivery or pick up services, take out on the rough days, anything that can automate extra tasks. Get creative. Determine what you need and find the help to make it happen. No martyr mentality allowed!

3.) Create rhythms that work for you.

I’ve talked about how helpful this is in this post and this post. And I’ve also created The Rhythms Guide just with you in mind.

Creating your daily, weekly + self-care rhythms will help everything flow smoother. Rhythms create structure without suffocating, provide framework while retaining lots of flexibility.

Here’s a peek at our daily rhythms:

  • Morning rituals – slow breakfast, going out front to sit in the sun, run and play and water our plants, and free play inside ( I usually tell them to find something creative to do)
  • Do at least 1 load of laundry to completion, clean 1 space – the kids help me fold and put away laundry, empty the dishwasher, vacuum, tidy their room and the house when needed. I usually concentrate on decluttering or cleaning one space each day.
  • Morning basket and concentrated learning time for an hour or so.
  • Outside or free play for a couple of hours.
  • Lunch time around noon.
  • Quiet time/nap time – usually from 1:30-3:30. This is when I fit in more concentrated self-care.
  • Outside or free play for a few hours.
  • Bedtime rituals – baths, free play, read aloud, singing songs and praying together.

One of the big things reflected in our daily rhythms is a back and forth type pattern. I saw someone use the term “inchworm” the other day. It’s this idea of doing something together (morning basket), then letting the kiddos do something on their own (free play) and back + forth like that. Of course I’m always there to provide supervision and direction when needed, but I’m not dictating every moment of every day.

Nor should we, mama! We are not responsible for the 24/7 entertainment of our children. I think this might be where a lot of disconnect happens between motherhood and self-care. Our kids don’t need us hovering, providing constant diversion, filling up every spare moment with activity. No! Mama, we need that extra energy, those spare moments to use in caring for ourselves.

Let the kiddos go, let them free play while you make and sip a warm drink, while you sit and journal or do a brain dump, while you do a work out video, while you read a chapter from a book, while you catch up on some nagging housework (#thisisselfcare).

Bonus: Once you work your way through this blog post, take #3 (establishing daily rhythms) and #6 (creating a daily self-care plan) and marry them together.

For example, I take the following list of self-care items and fit them in around our daily rhythms:

  • Morning skincare routine
  • Make and sip a warm drink
  • Move for 10-15 minutes
  • Read, nap, write, watch a show, lay out in the sun at quiet time
  • Soak in a detox bath

4.) Institute a daily quiet time.

I could not thrive in motherhood without this consistent break in the middle of the day. We usually have ours from 1:30-3:30pm and that gives me a larger chunk of time to practice self-care. I’ll do a yoga flow, take a shower, take a nap, lay out in the sunshine, read, watch a show, take care of nagging tasks, paint my nails, declutter something, etc.

My youngest naps, but my oldest two either play quietly or read books. I usually separate them and put my oldest at the dining room table playing legos and my middle one in her bed with quiet toys and books.

We have practiced this rhythm for a long time and it hasn’t always been easy. In fact, we still have our rough days. But it’s one of the few lines I’ve drawn in the sand because I firmly believe that we all need that break. They need down time for their little bodies and brains, I need down time for my sanity + #soulmindbodyselfcare, and we all need space from each other or we start to go a little crazy. So, don’t give up if it doesn’t work out seamlessly the first day or even the 30th day. Truly. It’s worth it.

Bonus: here are a few tips for a successful quiet time…

1.) Ease into it, starting with 30 minutes and working your way up to the full two hours over the course of a week or so.

2.) Remove yourself, mama. Send yourself back to your room, close the door and rest. Take a bath. Crawl into bed. Read a book. Do some yoga. But don’t stay out in the common area where you can hear every little sound or where they can easily access you. I tell my kids they can’t come into my room unless someone is bleeding or dying. Ha.

3) Stand your ground. Be firm. Explain the reason for quiet time and enforce consequences. Don’t give up. Eventually they will get it, even if it doesn’t look perfect.

5.) Practice self-care WITH them.

Whether you’ve grown into having kids at home or it’s been thrust on you overnight, learning to care for yourself while at the same time caring for the little people in your life is going to take time. It’s going to take re-adjusting. It’s going to take flexibility. And it’s going to take lots of grace.

Here’s an example: if you’ve been used to going to the gym and you miss your hour long, uninterrupted workouts, it’s going to take a little while to adjust to working out at home with littles. Maybe you already have? But if you can’t find that hour chunk of time in your day and you’re really missing it, try moving WITH your kids. Do a workout video on the back porch while they play, go for a walk or jog with the kids and intersperse sets of pushups, sit ups or sprints, turn on a yoga video in the living room and invite them to do it with you.

Other ideas for practicing self-care with kids:

  • Involve your kiddos in making a delicious lunch or an after-dinner treat.
  • Lay out and soak up some vitamin D while the kiddos play in the backyard. Bring your book and iced tea!
  • Lay on the couch and watch a family friendly show. Pop popcorn, bring all the blankets.

Bonus: If you crave alone time while you work out (or while you do any particular item of self-care), save it for quiet time. When the kids are settled, turn on that workout video, do a long yoga flow, or get out on a solo walk/jog while your husband holds down the fort. It’s necessary and good to be alone.

6.) Make your self-care plan the night before.

It helps so much to have a plan and it helps so much to have that plan written down before a new day starts.

First, after you’re cozy in bed for the night, pull out a notebook and pen. Second, take a minute and determine your top 3 self-care items for the next day. What do you need the most? Write those down. It doesn’t have to be just three, but I’ve found three to be a manageable start. Finally, determine where those self-care items are going to fit into your day. Schedule them in.

Are you craving extra time to get dressed and do your hair and makeup? Then make sure to plan accordingly and get up a little bit earlier. Do you love to cook and want to spend time solo in the kitchen with a cocktail and some music playing? Make it happen at lunch time if that works better than cramping the bedtime routine. If your husband is at home, see if he can wrangle the kids or simply send them out to play.

Bonus: if you’d like more help creating a self-care routine, check out this post.

Here are some of my favorite tips for keeping the kiddos happy when you need some peace:

Tip #1: Room time or outside time.

Institute “room time” when you need to concentrate on someone/something else. For toddlers, make it fun, put up the baby gate, make sure the room is kid proof (as much as humanly possible 😆) and set a timer. That way the toddler is contained + safe and you have a little peace of mind + focus. If your children are older, tell them they can play with the door closed, set the timer if it helps.

Have set time(s) every day you send the kids outside to play. This way the kids know to expect it and you can count on that time to practice self-care and get some things done. I like to leave a window open so I can hear what’s going on outside while going about my business.

In case you need some more ideas for keeping the kiddos busy inside and out, here are some activities my kiddos love: Kiwi Crate, paint by sticker books, sidewalk chalk (encourage them to draw roads and a city for their cars), bubbles with a giant wand, magnatiles, puzzles, Art Hub on Youtube

Tip #2: Don’t fear the screens.

Don’t fear the screens, mama. They can be super useful and amazing tools. Designate a favorite show or kid friendly app for times you need to nurse/care for the baby, make a phone call, practice self-care or do anything that requires undivided attention.

Favorite Shows: Word World, the original Magic School Bus, SuperBook, Chip ‘n Dale Rescue Rangers, Duck Tales

Favorite Apps: Joy Doodle, Little Writer and the YouVersion Bible app for Kids. We’re also trying out ABC Mouse and the kids really love it so far.

Tip #3: Limit the toys.

It sounds counter-intuitive, but it really works. Kids tend to play better with fewer choices. Divide the toys in half (or so) and put one half in the garage or up in the closet in storage. Also, now might be a good time to declutter/purge any toys that are broken, missing parts or aren’t being used regularly.

You can rotate the divided toys whenever you want. We usually rotate every month or so. And sometimes I put a lot more than half up. My rule when deciding how much to keep down is: do I want to bend over and pick that up or supervise the clean up? If I don’t, then it goes up or goes away. Any time I feel overwhelmed by messes, I know the toys need to be reduced.

Have any questions for me? Leave them in the comments and I’ll be happy to answer! You’ve got this, mama. 

For more self-care goodness, come join me on Instagram. And if you haven’t joined my email list yet, that’s a great place to find more of the same. Also, check out the side bar (or scroll all the way down if you’re on mobile) to view all the freebies I’ve created just with you in mind. I hope you find something helpful.

Let’s care for ourselves,

Hannah

Practical Ways to Care for Yourself + Your Family in Uncertain Times [Deep Breath, Mama – You’ve Got This]

Before we dive in, pause with me for just a moment, close your eyes and breathe in deep for four seconds, hold for three, and exhale all the air from your lungs for six.

Need more? That’s okay. Take a couple of minutes and repeat as many times as you need. I’ll be here.

Okay, ready? I know the world feels a little crazy and uncertain right now. Eerie is the word that came to my mind as I pushed my cart down the aisles at Costco. We live in interesting times.

So, I want to share some light, spread some peace, sprinkle a little grace into your current circumstances. I’m not sure where you are or what has changed for you over night, but I know that where we are in Washington State, schools have closed, gatherings of more than 250 have been suspended and social distancing is being encouraged. And, no, we don’t have any toilet paper here either. Ha.

I’m going to share with you some practical ways you can care for yourself + your family right now, today.

First up are some health + wellness tips and resources.

These are things I’m do on an on going basis and then ramp up as needed during winter or flu/novel corona-virus season:

  • Get plenty of sleep. Enforce early bedtimes, try not to skip any naps and, encourage a daily quiet time for everyone. Ours is usually from 1:30-3:30pm. My youngest naps, but my oldest two either play quietly or read books in separate places. I try my best to make this a time of rest for myself as well.
  • Reduce sugar + processed foods. Did you know that consuming sugar can reduce the effectiveness of our immune system up to 40% for up to 5 hours? Crazy, right? And processed foods don’t help either. They place an extra burden on our digestive systems and livers and can cause inflammation (which we don’t need if we’re trying to stay in the best health).
  • Focus on lots of fresh veggies and fruits. One of the things we do almost daily is make a green smoothie. If you need some fresh inspo, here are three of our favorite immune boosting recipes: Chocolate Cherry Green Smoothie, Beet-licious Smoothie and my Sunshine Smoothie.
  • Stay hydrated. This is so important! Staying hydrated supports every system in the body and can help flush out unwanted toxins. Mix it up with fresh squeezed lemon, frozen fruit, herbal teas, or other healthy + healing warm drinks.
  • Wash hands thoroughly. This goes without saying, but it’s so important. Encourage your kiddos to wash their hands as often as possible, keep their nails short and don’t forget to change out hand towels regularly. This is my favorite non-toxic all-purpose soap/cleaner/detergent/allthethings. I carry a small spray bottle in my purse and use it as a sanitizer, too.
  • Get outside + get fresh air and sunshine. Truly the best medicine! Let their little bodies soak up the vitamin D, clear their lungs and move their bodies. You, too, mama! Especially on the long days when cabin fever starts to set in, take advantage of the great out doors. Maybe try a local hike or walking path or even lay a picnic blanket down in your own backyard.
  • Get that lymph moving! Move daily (walk/yoga/HIIT) + practice dry brushing. Our lymphatic system plays a vital role in removing toxins from our bodies.
  • Use saline or Xlear to cleanse the nasal passages to prevent viruses from taking hold. I do this after any of us have been out and about.
  • Practice stress reduction. Deep breathing, yoga, meditation, journaling, detox baths, time alone, curling up with a favorite book or show for some down time. Stress wreaks havoc on our immune system, so do your best to reduce it as much as possible.

In addition to all of the above and a whole foods diet, here are some supplements I use to support our immune systems:

Colloidal Silver
Vitamin C
Echinacea/Goldenseal
My favorite Morning Multivitamin
Homemade Elderberry Syrup
The best kids’ Probiotic
Vitamin D3/K2
Propolis throat spray
Xlear

Here are a few more health + wellness resources I hope you find helpful + empowering:

A wonderfully comprehensive + informative blog post on this corona-virus and what measures we can be taking to protect our families. I believe Dr. Song is keeping that post updated with current statistics, travel precautions, etc.

This is an awesome thirteen minute video put out out by my friend and board certified holistic practitioner, Lindsay Amilian. It’s filled with great information and practical advice for preventive measures you can take to care for your family.

This next part is for the “accidental homeschooler”: my top tips + ideas for navigating this season with your kiddos at home.

I have a 7 year old and a 4 year old I am currently homeschooling; the 2 year old is just along for the ride at this point. But…aren’t we all? Ha.

First, mama, remember that children are born learners + they don’t need anything fancy from you. You don’t have to spend a ton of money on curriculum or supplies or kill yourself planning the perfect crafts or activities. In fact, it’s okay if they get bored! That’s a healthy + necessary precursor to learning and ingenuity and independence.

Second, repeat the deep breath sequence from the start of this blog post if you need to and give yourself lots of grace! Lots and lots of grace! We are all in this together, even us mamas who chose the homeschool path. There is no right or wrong way to go about this.

My top tip would be to set aside a few minutes, print out my Rhythms Guide, and figure out how you want your days and weeks to look in this season. Start there. It doesn’t have to be perfect. Just get a rough framework down on paper (the last page of the guide has a blank template for you to use!). This is going to help you so much by providing a general flow for you as well as some anchors that will keep you from drifting.

We have a few learning rhythms we incorporate into our days/weeks:

Daily

1.) My kiddos practice life skills by helping out with chores around the house. I encourage you to include your kiddos in the work that has to be done around the house. Things get messy when kids are always in the house (good messy, but still messy), so include them in the sweeping/dusting/vacuuming/mopping. Have them help fold and put away laundry, take out the trash, make their beds, empty the dishwasher, whatever tasks you deem age appropriate. Just remember: kiddos are eager to feel needed and apart of something bigger than themselves, as we all are. Also, they are so, so smart and capable. Don’t be afraid to push them outside their comfort zone a little bit.

2.) We have quiet time from 1:30-3:30pm. My youngest naps, but my oldest two either play quietly or read books. I usually separate them and put my oldest at the dining room table playing legos and my middle one in her bed with quiet toys and books.

We have practiced this rhythm for a long time and it hasn’t always been easy. In fact, we still have our rough days. But it’s one of the few lines I’ve drawn in the sand because I firmly believe that we all need that break. They need down time for their little bodies and brains, I need down time for my sanity + #soulmindbodyselfcare, and we all need space from each other or we start to go a little crazy. So, don’t give up if it doesn’t work out seamlessly the first day or even the 30th day. Truly. It’s worth it.

Here are a few tips for a successful quiet time:

1.) Ease into it, starting with 30 minutes and working your way up to the full two hours over the course of a week or so.

2.) Remove yourself, mama. Send yourself back to your room, close the door and rest. Take a bath. Crawl into bed. Read a book. Do some yoga. But don’t stay out in the common area where you can hear every little sound or where they can easily access you. I tell my kids they can’t come into my room unless someone is bleeding or dying. Ha.

3) Stand your ground. Be firm. Explain the reason for quiet time and enforce consequences. Don’t give up. Eventually they will get it, even if it doesn’t look perfect.

Weekly

Monday: morning basket. I curate a basket filled with books to read, a game to play, these cards from Kids Read Truth, art supplies, and our day board that reviews the weather/seasons/months/days of the week and telling time.

Tuesday: tea time + Bible study. I usually do this with just the big kids while my youngest is finishing up his nap. I brew some tea, make a little treat and we work through our Kids Read Truth Hebrews study together. Sometimes I read a book afterwards or we just talk.

Wednesday: adventure. Which I know is kind of limited right now. I’m not really taking the kiddos out anywhere, save for a very selective park date. This would be a great day for a local hike or an extended walk in the neighborhood.

Thursday: art time + read aloud. Just what it sounds like. I set them up with paints/markers/playdough and let them create while I read.

Friday: free. I like to keep one day open. Usually I do a bigger cleaning push on this day and they spend more time outside in free play. You could also do morning basket again or repeat another one of the rhythms that especially resonates with you.

Here are a few other ideas:

  • Get outside as much as possible. Fresh air and sunshine and free play are the best medicine! My kids spend 4-5 hours outside each day. When the weather is extra beautiful, it goes up to 6-7 hours and we eat our meals outside, too. If your kiddos aren’t used to extended time outside, work up slowly. It will take time. And, depending on their age, you might need to let them in for lots of potty breaks and feed them snacks periodically. Ha. Other ideas: blow bubbles (my kids love this wand), take them on a local hike or go for a long walk/bike ride in the neighborhood.
  • Plant a garden together. Grow some good-for-you veggies and spend some quality time together. Plus digging in the dirt is a proven way to boost your immune system and relieve stress.
  • Cook or bake something together. This is an awesome way to work towards a common goal, sneak in a little math and enjoy a tasty creation in the end.
  • Now may be a great time to invest in a subscription like Kiwi Crate. They have a box for each age group that provides hours of hands on, STEM related learning.
  • If you stock up on anything, make it art supplies. Lots of drawing paper, good quality markers, paints, crayons, etc and then utilize Art Hub on YouTube. It’s free and so much fun, my kids draw for hours when I turn it on.
  • How about a good, old-fashioned read aloud? I like to curate a stack of books based on my kids’ current interests or the current season, but you don’t even have to get that crazy. Just grab a stack of books, sit down on the couch and start reading. I guarantee they will be gathered around you (and on top of you) in no time.
  • Now is the time to pull out all the puzzles, board games, card games, whatever you have. My kids love any puzzles by Ravensburger and Melissa & Doug has some great floor puzzles for younger ages. They love playing Memory, Trouble, Eye Found It Busytown Edition, Candyland, Tic Tac Toe and Battleship.
  • Also, don’t fear the screens. There is a time and a place to turn on the TV or the iPad. There are so many educational programs on YouTube, Netflix has the original Magic Schoolbus, Amazon has Word World. This might also be a good time to revisit all the old Disney movies and my kids love watching HGTV home shows with me as well as Beat Bobby Flay or any of the kids baking contests on Food Network.

A few other resources:

My good friend Jessica has a blog post titled “What To Do When Your Family is Stuck at Home” and she’s offering a free printable with ideas to keep the kiddos busy.

This blog post is full of great information + tips on what to do if you find yourself unexpectedly homeschooling.

One last section here, last but not least. I’m going to link up a bunch of resources for you to read on your own time full of ways you can care for yourself, mama.

Because if we’re not taking care of ourselves through all of this, we’re not going to be able to take care of our people. It starts with us.

Here are some of my top resources for self-care in this crazy season:

Have any questions for me? Leave them in the comments and I’ll be happy to answer! You’ve got this, mama. Never fear! One breath, one step, one day at a time.

For more self-care goodness, come join me on Instagram. And if you haven’t joined my email list yet, that’s a great place to find more of the same. Also, check out the side bar (or scroll all the way down if you’re on mobile) to view all the freebies I’ve created just with you in mind. I hope you find something helpful.

Let’s care for ourselves,

Hannah

Using Rhythms as a Powerful Tool for Self-care [A Simple How To Guide + Free Printable]

Rhythms not routines. I first started using that phrase when my daughter was a baby. It was my way of reminding myself that I could still establish constants in the midst of a chaotic and unpredictable season. Like Leonardo DiCaprios’ top in “Inception” – rhythms brought me back to reality and grounded me in the present. They still do. Because life will always be chaotic and unpredictable at times.

One of the biggest keys to transformative self-care is establishing rhythms that work for you.

I believe that establishing rhythms that work for you is so important, I’m going to turn it into a little series. This post will be more of a macro view of rhythms (the why and how). And then in subsequent posts, I will dive into the micro view and what they might look like on a daily, weekly, monthly and seasonal basis.

Sneak peek: one of our favorite weekly rhythms these days? When the big kiddos and I have tea time on Tuesdays. We’re working our way through the She Reads Truth Hebrews study for kids. We sip a warm drink, savor a treat and talk. It’s become a special part of our week.

More on that later. First, let’s talk about WHY rhythms are essential to self-care and HOW to create rhythms that work best for you. Hang with me because I also have a free printable for you.

The Why

The dictionary defines a rhythm as: “a strong, regular, repeated pattern of movement or sound.” For our purposes, rhythms are “a strong, regular, repeated pattern of…” #soulmindbodyselfcare. And self-care includes easing the demands of motherhood, the managing of our homes, the caring for ourselves and just life in general.

What I love about rhythms is that they provide a framework, but they’re not ridged or inflexible. I’m a planner who also doesn’t like to feel “stuck,” so rhythms are my happy place. Rhythms are powerful tools for self-care because they can ebb and flow, shift and change as needed. They are a flexible guide that provides structure without suffocating.

The How

Okay, rhythms are helpful and important, but how do you use them in a way that works for you? I’m going to share what our rhythms look like right now and then I’ll share a few steps you can take to establish your own. This is going to be a quick over-view because I plan to go into much more detail in subsequent posts. If you have any questions, drop them in the comments and I’ll be happy to answer them!

Daily

I break up our days into five key rhythms:

  1. morning (warm lemon water/slow breakfast/warm drink)
  2. one load/one space (i.e. laundry + cleaning)
  3. learning (examples: morning basket/tea time/adventure)
  4. quiet time (usually 1:30-3:30pm)
  5. evening (examples: unwinding/skincare/brain dump)

These are the rhythms that work for us right now. We follow them even on the weekends, too, although a little more relaxed. But I’ve found that I can’t go two solid days without incorporating them in some way. And when I feel a little lost on a Sunday afternoon, I return to the rhythms. With in an hour, overwhelm is quelled and calm is restored.

Weekly

Our weekly rhythms look like:

  • Monday – morning basket
  • Tuesday – tea time
  • Wednesday – adventure
  • Thursday – art + read aloud
  • Friday – free
  • Saturday – solo time + mama date
  • Sunday – rest + prep for the week

These weekly rhythms really act as anchors for us. They hold me steady when I start to drift and wonder what the heck I’m doing with my life. Ha. The kids love having some thing to look forward to (tea time is the most talked about around here) and I appreciate the level of consistency these rhythms bring to our days.

Monthly

Because the mama is the heartbeat of the home, our months are heavily influenced by my cycle. They always have been, for better or worse, but this past year I’ve really started to embrace it for the wonderful thing it is. Each month is like a mini year with all four seasons and it really is amazing. I detail out what each season looks like below, but that’s essentially what our months look like, too: winter, spring, summer and autumn. I try to plan our month accordingly, knowing when I am higher energy and when I will need to slow way down.

Also, each month I try to make these 5 grounding actions priority, too:

1.) Two Fridays a month my husband and I have date night, whether we go out or stay in, it gives us a regular chance to catch up, go deeper than we’re able on a regular evening and do something fun together.

3.) I focus on refreshing one space on a budget. This month it was the kiddos bathroom and the half bath. I’m so excited with how they turned out. I do my best to use what we have and only bring in what we need.

4.) I do what I call an “office catch up” a couple times through out the month. This is when I will update the budget, go through any paper work, back up the pictures/videos from my phone, catch up our current photo album and our 1 Second Everyday.

5.) I review my goals for the month weekly, but a couple times a month I sit down to reevaluate and around the last week of the month, I’ll look ahead to the new month and set fresh goals.

Seasonal

Our seasonal rhythms tend to look like this:

Winter – Hibernate.
Rest, stay at home most days, move slow. Lots of reading + snuggles.
Practice restorative self-care: warm drinks, long baths, cozy layers, naps, hearty soups + stews, early bed times.

Spring – Ease out of our cocoon.
Decluttering the house/mind/schedule, planting the garden + spending hours outside each day. Practice reawakening self-care. Yoga outside, laying in the sun, mornings on the front porch, weekly hikes, fresh + simple foods.

Summer – We’re alive! Park dates and hiking/river/day trip/camping adventures. Practice energetic self-care. Soak up all the sun, join the kiddos in the water, quiet times spent laying out + reading, lots of time in nature, evenings on the back porch until the sun sets.

Autumn – Slow down. Reflect + re-set intentions. Tune in, savor, draw in. Decluttering the house/mind/schedule. Practice preparatory self-care. Embrace home, warm drinks, let go, stock up on self-care essentials, get to bed earlier.

Grab my Rhythms Guide here. The first page is a copy of our current rhythms to use as a guide, the second page is a step by step guide to creating rhythms that work for you and the third page is a template you can use to record your own rhythms.

These are rhythms that work for us at this time. They’re an example of how rhythms look when you use them as a tool for self-care. And that’s the thing – you have to establish rhythms that work for you, right where you are. NOT ones that work for your friend or your sister or your mother or anyone else. Not ones that will last forever and ever and never need to change. That’s missing the point.

What works for someone else might not work for you. And what works for you now might not work next month or even next week.

So, how do you establish rhythms that work for you, right now, today? Let’s dive in…

How to Create Your Own Rhythms

  1. Print The Rhythms Guide (these steps are included in the guide). Then grab a notebook and a pen and write down what your ideal day would look like. Don’t over think it. Dream big here. Do list-style, bullet journal-style, any-style. Just get it down on paper.
  2. Repeat step one for your ideal week, month and all four of the seasons. Don’t write down what you think it “should” look like or what it looks like now. Write down what you want it to look like – your ideals, your vision, your dream list, the way they would go if it was your choice.
  3. Step back, review everything you wrote down under each section and realize this, mama: it is your choice. Ultimately, it doesn’t just have to be an ideal or a vision or some far-off dream. What you do, how you spend your days, weeks, months, seasons is YOUR choice. You get to decide. It’s your life.
  4. Add, take-away, scratch out, re-write, get each list where you want it to be for right now. Because things will ebb and flow. They will shift and change. Don’t worry about then, just focus on right now.
  5. Use the third page of The Rhythms Guide to fill in your rhythms. Put it somewhere you will see it every day. Maybe tape it to the inside of a cabinet in your kitchen? Put it by your bedside so you see it first thing in the morning? Review it often, refer to it when you start to feel overwhelmed or off-kilter.
  6. Give the rhythms a week or two, see how they work for you. Tweak and shift where you need to. And don’t be afraid to swap days of the week or move things around as you need. Flow with them, let them show you what needs to come or go.
  7. Repeat these steps as necessary. At the new year, beginning of a new season, after a major transition (i.e. a move, a new baby, etc), on a random Wednesday in November when you realize the current rhythms just aren’t working anymore. Save The Rhythms Guide to re-print whenever you need it.

What do you think, mama? Have any questions for me? Leave them in the comments and I’ll be sure to answer them.

And don’t forget to download The Rhythms Guide…

I’m over on Instagram and, if you haven’t signed up for my email list, I’m there, too. If you sign up, I’m giving you my Healthy + Healing Warm Drink Guide FREE.

Let’s care for ourselves,

Hannah

5 Ways To Care For Yourself During the Holidays

Mama, of all the seasons of the year where you should feel happy, light, peaceful and rested…it should be the holiday season. Our society has manufactured the idea of hustle + bustle, has told us it’s what true holiday spirit looks like, that our kids will grow up hating us and have to go to therapy if we don’t “do Santa” or bake 6 different kinds of cookies or wear ourselves out trying to find the perfect gifts. That’s just not true.

This should be a season of tuning in to the beauty right in front of us. A season of caring for ourselves and our dear ones and extending kindness to those in need. A season of soaking up the simple moments which usually end up being the most profound. This should be a season of making memories: of home, a crackling fire, Christmas stories read aloud, Bing Crosby serenading, and the story of Jesus’ birth lighting the way once again into a brand new year.

Perhaps even more so in 2020 than any other year before: We need peace, we need simplicity, we need quieted hearts, we need rest. We’ve already told our kiddos that this Christmas is going to be a simple, quiet one. No big to-do’s, no crazy happenings, just us – family – soaking up the beauty of the season. We’ve even called a toy moratorium. Except for a few things they need, a few books and learning resources, we’re not expending a lot of time or money on gift giving this year. The season itself and the depth of what it really means – Jesus, Emmanuel, Come to Live Among Us – is what we want to shine out above all else. And, you know what? They complained briefly the first time we mentioned our plan. The next time, not a peep. I think they were starting to understand. We keep repeating our plan periodically and I think I even spotted a bit of relief in their faces this last time. I know I feel relief.

Remember, mama, we have a choice. We have a lot more control over how the holiday season plays out (and our lives) then we often like to admit. Also, there’s this: true self-care – the kind that is consistent, tangible and life-changing – doesn’t have to cost any money or require large chunks of time. It doesn’t even mean you have to leave your house.

Let’s dive into my top 5 tips for caring for yourself this holiday season…

No.1 Get your sleep.

Sleep changes everything. Any mama knows this is true. It has to be a non-negotiable. Our bodies need 7.5-9 solid hours of sleep every night. On days we’re super active, we might even need a 20-30 minute nap mid-afternoon. Listen to your body. Follow it’s lead. Whatever needs to happen for you to get rest, make it happen.

  • Set a firm bed time + wake time for the kiddos (they need their rest, too!).
  • Work together with your husband to make sure you’re both supporting each other in getting rest.
  • Aim to be in bed a full hour earlier than you want to go to sleep. Read, relax, do a brain dump, unwind and turn out those lights on time.
  • Limit caffeine after noon and don’t drink alcohol or eat a heavy meal right before bed.
  • Use black out blinds or an eye mask to block out light.
  • Keep your bedroom cool for sleeping.
  • Use white noise or ear plugs to make sure you’re not disturbed (especially if you go to bed before your husband).

A note to mamas with young babies: The first two years with each kiddo can totally be rough, I get it completely. If it helps, don’t look at the quantity of sleep as much as the quality of sleep in those seasons. Work to optimize the sleep you do get. Example: if you can get your longer stretch of sleep each night from 10-2am that’s when our bodies do a majority of the detoxing/restoring/resetting and that will definitely optimize your sleep.

Also, check out Taking Cara Babies if you haven’t already. I’m not getting paid to share about her, but I would pay any amount of money to sleep well in the early months [years!] with my babies. Cara also has so much good information on her blog and IG page for free. Check her out! I’m taking her First Five Months course in preparation for our fourth baby’s arrival.

No.2 Make a daily #soulmindbodyselfcare appointment with yourself.

This means every single day you’re going to spend at least 10 minutes caring for your soul, mind or body. Put it on your calendar, set a reminder, make it happen. If you can give more time, then set aside more time. Go, mama! If you need to spread out the time in smaller chunks over the course of the day, then do that. Whatever works best with your schedule, whatever best meets your needs.

Here are some ideas for your time each day:

  • Take a detox bath.
  • Make a warm drink + sip it slowly (get my favorite recipes HERE).
  • Spend some time goal setting + intention setting for the new year.
  • Paint your nails.
  • Move your body – yoga, pilates, HIIT, go for a walk.
  • Do a brain dump.
  • Work on a passion project.
  • Declutter one space in your home.
  • Hydrate with a tall glass of water.

No.3 Drink a daily green smoothie.

There’s bound to be more sugar floating around during the holiday season. And it’s sometimes difficult to control what you eat and where due to family gatherings and holiday events. But if you start the day out right with a green smoothie (or even sub it for lunch or your afternoon pick-me-up), your body will thank you.

I swear by a daily green smoothie to keep illness at bay. This Chocolate Cherry Smoothie recipe is one of my favorites and this Beet-licious Smoothie is another on rotation over here. If neither of those strike a cord, maybe give my Sunshine Smoothie a try. It’s packed full of nutrients that will give your mind, body (and immune system!) a boost.

For more on winter wellness, check out my blog post and podcast episode all about why/how/what I stock to support our immune systems through the colder months.

No.4 Carve out quiet time before the day begins.

I know this is easier said than done, but it’s a lifesaver. Even just having 10 minutes to myself, to start the day on my own terms, makes a huge difference in how the rest of the day goes.

This is my typical morning routine right now:

I wake up around 7am, I do my tongue scraping/teeth brushing, splash cold water on my face and use the restroom. Then I apply my favorite face oil or serum (right now it’s this one – bonus: it smells like Christmas) and hop back in bed to do my gua sha routine (if you don’t know what gua sha is, here’s a great tutorial).

Then I dive into my quiet time. Right now I’m reading through the Psalms using a journal Bible. Then I pray through my list of what I call “affirmational prayers” – statements of faith in prayer form. Then I’ll look over my to-do list for the day, check email quickly, reply to any texts and then throw on my slippers and a cozy sweater and make my way out to the kitchen to start the day.

All of that might take me 20 minutes, but I am much more ready to jump into the fray when I’ve had some peaceful moments to myself first. I have a lot more patience and joy and our day just flows better.

Side note for mamas who have early wakers like I do: Don’t be afraid to set boundaries. My kids are in their room until 7:30am. They can use the restroom and they have their waters, but they are in their room with the door closed until it’s time to begin our day together. This is the boundary I’ve set and it works well for us. Do what works best for you, mama, but set those boundaries.

No.5 Say NO to anything that does not light you up.

Let’s make this tip specific to Christmas, although it can be applied to any holiday, birthdays or really any time of year. I love to send our annual Christmas card. It’s my thing. And because I love to send it, it’s fun to create, not a burden. I love having special Christmas mugs for each kid and making hot cocoa with marshmallows every chance we get. I love taking the kids to Hobby Lobby to pick out an ornament each year. I love observing a simple advent. I love making + decorating sugar cookies with the kiddos; we usually do that 2-3 times during the season. I love minimalist decor that melds with the color pallet of our home, that I can keep up through winter season (it’s such a downer to strip the house bare come January 1st).

What I don’t love? Time consuming crafts. Elaborate advent calendars. Lots of decorating that I have to take down/put away/store. Intricate traditions that depend on several different variables to be just right. Intense baking. Going anywhere crowded. Being out late. Being out. Period. Ha. So I don’t. I just say no. In fact, like I said at the beginning of this post, we don’t have anything currently planned for the month of December.

Choose the things you love, that light you up and and leave the rest. Never apologize if your style of savoring the season looks more like staying home in your cozy slippers and reading Christmas books to your kids by the fire. I promise your kids won’t care. All they want is a happy mama, a mama who is caring for herself.

Have any questions for me? Leave them in the comments and I’ll be happy to answer! You’ve got this, mama. Never fear! One breath, one step, one day at a time.

For more self-care goodness, come join me on Instagram and find the companion podcast episode for this post HERE. And if you haven’t joined my email list yet, that’s a great place to find more of the same.

Check out the side bar (or scroll all the way down if you’re on mobile) to view the freebies I’ve created just with you in mind. I hope you find something helpful.

Let’s care for ourselves,

Hannah

6 Practical Ways to Reduce Your Stress [+ Reclaim Your Sanity, Especially If You Have Littles]

I’m not writing this post because I have all the answers. Or because I’ve discovered the secret to living stress-free. I’m writing this post because I need it just as much as you do. Maybe more. I’m writing it because I’ve found a few key things that have helped me reduce my stress, and I want to share those things in case they help you, too.

These tips can work for anyone, but I’m coming from the motherhood perspective. Truth: being a mom is wonderful + beautiful + a dream come true for me. It’s also the hardest thing I’ve ever done + is incredibly stressful at times. I have three littles and nothing can raise my blood pressure more, leave me begging for some space or make me feel like running away some days, ha.

I hope these tips meet you wherever you are and become tools in your stress reducing toolbox like they have for me.

Let’s dive in..

1.) SET THOSE BOUNDARIES.

I put this first because I believe it’s foundational. If we don’t know how to set boundaries, we will always live in a state of stress.

I’m going to get super personal and give specific examples of how I set boundaries to reduce stress:

  • I say no to over commitment. I think really, really hard about how plans will play out before I say yes to anything. If I feel anything but a “YES!”, it’s a no.
  • I leave plenty of margin in our days. Most days we are at home. If we do go somewhere, it’s rarely ever before 10am or after 6pm. No rushing. No early mornings or late nights. No burning the candle at both ends.
  • I have a firm wake up time for the kiddos. They don’t get to leave their room in the morning until 7:45am and they must be dressed with bed made and teeth brushed. Might sound intense, but it’s what works for us. They can get up and play whenever they want, but they stay in their room with the door closed.
  • I also have firm nap/quiet time and bed times. For my sake and for theirs! Remember, mama: we’re modeling stress reduction for our kids. Routines that ensure adequate rest + sleep are so important.
  • I like to keep our weekends mostly free. Rarely do we have something scheduled two weekends in a row.

I could go on, but I think that’s a pretty good peek into how I set boundaries to reduce stress. There’s no one size fits all. It takes trial and error just like most things in life, but I encourage you to find and firmly hold to your boundaries.

2.) CHOOSE A FORM OF MOVEMENT YOU LOVE.

I used to dread working out. Exercising just seemed like a waste of time and left me feeling worse than when I started. Then I learned I was approaching it all wrong. Moving our bodIES should support our health, not harm it. It should help us relax when all is said and done, not cause more stress. Because any stress – whether “good” or bad – is processed by our body in the same way.

So find some movement that supports your body. That doesn’t leave you drained for days afterwards. That doesn’t cause more harm than good.

My favorite way to move is yoga. I practice from home using YouTube videos. I try to do at least 5 minutes a day, if not 15-20 minutes, depending on how I feel.

Some of my other favorite ways to move:

  • Taking the kiddos on a long morning walk.
  • Hiking our local trails.
  • Adding sprints while I’m pushing the jogging stroller.
  • Fitting in some cardio with a 10-15 minute HIIT workout.

It really doesn’t matter what you do. If it’s something you love and it gets you moving, just aim for consistency. As they say in yoga, “Your daily practice is your strongest practice.”

3.) GET OUTSIDE.

For as much as you can, for as long as you can each day. There are so many studies that show being in nature helps reduce stress. Here’s how I make it happen:

  • I sit on our front porch first thing, while I hydrate, even if it’s just for five minutes. I get some sun on my face, listen to the birds, take a deep breath and feel much better.
  • I also like to lay out mid-day on the nicer, warm days. I soak up some vitamin D and drink a tall glass of water. Sometimes I read a book.
  • The kids and I are generally outside for 4-6 hours a day during nice weather. A few hours in the morning so they can ride their bikes and I can water our plants + gardens or observe the chaos (ha!) while enjoying a cup of something warm. Then a few hours in the afternoon after their quiet time.
  • Sometimes we go for a morning walk. Sometimes we eat all our meals outside. My main goal is as much fresh air and sunshine as we can stand. Ha.
  • If you’re working and you spend most of your time inside (I’ve been there!) aim to get some morning time outside before work if you can, step out on your lunch break for 20-30 min and then build an evening walk or dinner on the patio into your routine.

4.) REDUCE PHYSICAL CLUTTER.

This has been a game changer for me. It hasn’t happened over night, but slowly, steadily I’ve minimized our physical clutter. Here are a few things you can do to get started:

  • Rotate your kids’ toys. I keep a bin for each kiddo that stays up in the closet. Every 4-6 weeks we rotate the toys they have out with the toys in the bins. It’s one for one. I don’t have a specific number of toys they can keep out, but my two major criteria are: 1.) what fits in their toy bin and 2.) what I don’t mind seeing scattered all across the house. Bonus: we also rotate our books so we only have a certain number down at any given time.
  • Clear off your counter tops. Only keep out what you love and use daily. Bonus: keep the flow going + clear all flat surfaces.
  • Build a capsule wardrobe. Sell or donate anything you don’t love or need. Check out this post for my top tips for building a capsule you love.
  • Keep a permanent donation box in your garage. Go through one space a week. When the box is filled, put it in the trunk and take it to donation.
  • Leave plenty of white space on your walls. I don’t hang stuff just to fill space. I love everything I put on our walls…and I love all the white space just as much.

5.) REDUCE MENTAL CLUTTER.

  • Do a brain dump once a day. I usually do mine at night before bed or whenever I feel like I have a million thing swimming around in my brain that I need to capture on paper.
  • Write down your monthly, weekly and daily goals. Get them down in black and white. Make them doable and specific. I also write down any commitments, event, must do’s so I don’t miss anything.
  • Keep your to do list to your top three tasks. Don’t have a list a mile long. Keep it short and sweet. Build that momentum. Maybe start with a quick task so you have an easy win to get the ball rolling.
  • Delegate whenever you can. To your spouse, the kiddos, a house cleaner, a personal shopper or meal service, subscription, etc.

More on delegating to your kiddos…

Because, mamas, you need to hear this: our kids are capable of so much and the truth is they want and need to help. They need to feel a part of the family, like they are contributing. Don’t be afraid to give them tasks, to rely on them to do age appropriate work, or even to push them a little bit outside their comfort zones.

My six and three year old routinely make their beds + clean their room, empty the dishwasher, fold and put away laundry, clear their dishes + sweep up under their chairs, pull weeds in our garden, etc. They do it all with ease (note, I didn’t say without complaining, haha) and it’s such a great opportunity to gain a strong work ethic, to learn what it takes to run a household and to realize how important each member is to the success of the whole family.

6.) DE-TOX YOUR EATING (+YOUR HOME ENVIRONMENT).

Okay, this one might be a can of worms, but I had to mention it because it’s made such an impact on my body’s ability to handle stress. I recently had a food sensitivity test done through my doctor and discovered I am highly sensitive to several foods that I eat on a regular basis. I’ve since cut those foods out and I am already seeing improvements. The biggest one so far: better sleep.

I was sleeping horribly before. I was always restless, had hot flashes or night sweats, vivid dreams…just over all crappy sleep. Even when my baby started sleeping routinely through the night. It turns out the foods I was sensitive to were affecting my quality of sleep. And sleep is so, so important when it comes to stress reduction. If we’re not sleeping well, we’re not going to handle stress well. As any new parent knows, ha.

Cleaning up your diet can help to significantly reduce stress on your body. Here are some things I’ve done to clean up my diet:

  • I cut out all the foods I’m sensitive to: yeast, gluten, wheat, bananas, eggs, all dairy products, and cane sugar. I’m not drinking alcohol and I’ve significantly reduced my caffeine intake.
  • I drink at least half my body weight in ounces of filtered water daily.
  • I eat 6-8 servings of veggies a day.
  • I buy organic, non-GMO, non-conventional food products as much as possible.
  • I only take high quality supplements (no fillers) + only when I need them.

Keep in mind, this is by no means an exhaustive list and it’s personalized to me. So, don’t just do what I’m doing. I encourage you to find a good functional medicine doctor, get tested and build a clean eating plan that works for you.

Another big thing I’ve done is to clean up our home environment and lighten our toxic load. This also reduces the amount of stress on our bodies. We might not be able to control the rest of the world, but we can control our homes. Here’s what you can do:

  • Open your windows on the regular. Turn on the fans and get the air circulating.
  • Wet dust, vacuum and wash bedding + curtains regularly.
  • Replace any toxic cleaners, laundry products and personal care products (check out the Environmental Working Group (EWG) for ratings) with clean ones. I love Branch Basics for all my cleaning and laundry needs. BambuEarth is my favorite clean beauty company and W3ll People sell some of my favorite clean makeup.
  • Get a whole house air filtration system or these air purifiers for each bedroom like we did.
  • Get a whole house water filtration system or this counter top filter we love that removes most contaminants including fluoride.
  • Buy organic, non-toxic furniture and bedding whenever possible.

Remember: take one step at a time. None of this will happen over night. It’s a journey. Do what you can with what you have and, as time and budget allows, do a little bit more.

And that’s a wrap! Let me know in the comments if you have tips to add or any questions at all.

For more self-care goodness, come join me on Instagram.

Or check out my podcast The Self-Care Sessions.

If you haven’t joined my email list yet, that’s a great place to find more of the same.

Also, check out the side bar (or scroll all the way down if you’re on mobile) to view all the freebies I’ve created just with you in mind. I hope you find something helpful.

Now you can download The Soul Mind Body Selfcare Guide: 30 Ways to Start Caring For Yourself When You Don’t Know Where to Start for FREE.

Let’s care for ourselves,

Hannah

The Magic Question Every Mom Needs to Ask Herself at Naptime [+ Why It Changes Everything]

I rocked in place while my little girl nursed. Her eyes started to close, her lashes brushing her chubby cheeks. Finally she relaxed against me and I laid her in her crib, held my breath.

Getting my daughter to nap was always a precarious operation. Getting her to sleep period was precarious. And often unsuccessful. But it appeared I might actually get some alone time that afternoon. My three year old son was already napping in the other room. I was hopeful. I needed that time so badly after a crazy morning and a sleepless night.

She was asleep. Somehow the stars had aligned. The house was quiet as I tip toed out, being careful not to let the door click shut behind me.

Ahhhhh… But then I was faced with the question that I almost dreaded more than the afternoons when neither of my babies slept:

“What do I do now?”

It was paralyzing. Wanting to do everything and nothing at the same time. Do I sit and stare at the wall? Fold laundry? Update the budget, pay bills, finish dishes? Do I work out? Take a nap? Watch TV, scroll Insta or both?

Can any mamas out there relate? Have you asked yourself that question, too? Felt just as paralyzed?

What I’ve learned and what I wish I would have known then is that I was asking the wrong question. It’s overwhelming to ask “What do I do now?” And, for me at least, my hyper sense of responsibility would kick in and that question would become, “What do I have to do now?”

Naptime does sometimes have to be spent getting things done. And that in and of itself is self-care. Taking care of business so it’s not nagging or weighing on us.

But I often made non-urgent tasks urgent and lost the chance to fill my cup during those quiet moments.

When my third baby was born, I started asking myself a different question. I like to call it the “magic” question:

“What do I NEED right now?”

This question changes everything. It removes the overwhelm and the hyper sense of responsibility and it gives you the chance to put self-care into action.

What do you need? Right now, in this moment? You may need to:

  • sleep. And if you do, by all means, sleep, mama
  • sit on the back porch with your face to the sun
  • do some gentle yoga, or even a 15 minute HIIT workout
  • paint your nails
  • fix yourself a salad
  • read a book you’ve been wanting to read
  • do a face mask
  • walk around the backyard
  • eat that square of dark chocolate that’s been calling your name
  • do a brain dump
  • soak in the tub
  • spend a few minutes doing your hair and makeup

Only you know what you need. So, when you can, as often as you can, at naptime:

Set aside all you HAVE to do and do what you NEED instead.

I just tip toed out of my daughter’s room, being careful not to let the door click shut behind me. She’s three years old now and getting her to sleep at nap time is still precarious. Before I became a parent I always swore I’d never lay down with one of my children to get them to sleep…but I lay down with my daughter at nap time sometimes, just in the hopes that I will get some precious time alone.

And then I ask myself the magic question: what do I need right now?

Oh, what a difference from the question I used to ask myself after tip toeing out of her room.

Today I need to write. Putting the written world out there for the world to read is part of my self-care. I also need to hydrate and soak up some vitamin D, so I’m going to sign off in just a minute to do both those things.

How about you, mama? If you get those precious moments of quiet today, will you promise me to ask yourself what you need?

I don’t call it the magic question for nothing. It’s changed everything for me and I know it will for you, too.

Let’s care for ourselves,

Hannah

P.S. Sign up for the monthly #soulmindbodyselfcare newsletter that’s full of so much more self-care goodness and get my Selfcare Guide for FREE.

P.P.S. Read my response to the popular advice “sleep while the baby sleeps” right here.