Goal setting can feel very nebulous. Just like self-care in general, it can feel unreachable, unattainable. But it doesn’t have to be and I hope to change that with this post.
Listen to the companion podcast episodes here and here. It’s a two part series.
I also created a FREE guide just for you, to use in conjunction with this blog post and the podcast episodes.
The first page of the guide isall about getting started. Here’s the thing about getting started with setting attainable goals: it’s not about what others are doing or what you think you SHOULD be doing; it’s about what lights you up, what’s in line with your priorities, what you’re passionate about and what God is calling you to do.
I’ve often set goals that are lofty and amazing and good, but were based on what someone else was doing or what I thought I should be doing. Instead of what lit a fire in MY soul, what MY top priorities were, what MY passions were and what God was calling ME to do.
Those are the questions we need to be asking ourselves in order to set goals we will actually meet. Because when you set goals based on what someone else is doing or what you think you should be doing, very rarely will you end up meeting them. Because the true, powerful form of motivation you need just isn’t there. Your motivation isn’t based on anything sound that’s going to carry you through.
But when you sit down and ask the question: “What lights a fire in MY soul?” The chances of meeting that goal are so much greater. Because your motivation has a sound basis, not superficial.
When you sit down and ask the question: “What are MY priorities in life?” That helps you set goals that actually apply to your life and what matters most to you, what you want to see accomplished, what you want your life to look like. That totally shifts the kinds of goals your going to set.
When you sit down and ask the question: “What am I passionate about?” that automatically rules out so many goals you could set and helps you really dial down on what goals you will actually meet. If you try to set a goal your not passionate about, that’s not going to get you very far. I’m talking about setting goals for this year, for the next five years, ten years…or even this month, this week, this day… you have to be passionate about those goals in order to see follow through.
When you sit down and ask the question: “What is God calling ME to do?” That’s going to look different than what other people are doing or even what you think you SHOULD be doing. When you sit down and ask God what He wants you to do, He shows you what to let go of and what to hold to. That shift brings such illumination and so many open doors.
Side note: I know from personal experience that just because a goal is for me (it lights me up, it’s in line with my priorities, it’s my passion and it’s what God is calling me to do) doesn’t mean it’s going to be easy. But God will be with us and help us get from point A to point B. Not by our lofty desires or our failing human motivation.
So, this is when grabbing the guide and printing it out will really help. Take that first page, set aside some quiet time where you can think and pray through those questions. That’s the foundation of successful goal setting, that’s where you’re going to see the needle move.
Page two of the Goals Guideis all about getting specific. It’s great to have long term/big picture goals, but them we really want to zoom in, get detailed, set time frames, etc.
If you’re not specific with your goals, you’re not really going to know how or when you meet them. If they are nebulous to begin with, they are going to be nebulous to end with. I don’t know about you, but I want to know when I’ve accomplished a goal.
The first question to ask (based on the questions from page one above) is: “What are my top three goals?” I’m not saying you can only have three goals in life, but I think three goals is a good place to start if you don’t know where to start.
This is where we start to get specific. Here are the next few questions to ask:
What can you do in the next 12 months to make those goals a reality?
How about each month?
How about each week?
How about each day?
Again, carve out some quiet time to really sit and pray over your answers.
Breaking down our goals into bite size pieces reduces overwhelm. When we set big goals, but don’t map out the daily/weekly/monthly/yearly steps to reach them, we’re going to be paralyzed. We might have this goal that meets all the criteria on page one, but if we don’t break it down into specific steps we won’t ever reach it.
Here’s an example: my 7 year old learning to read this summer. We set up a reading challenge of our own and his goal was to read 40 books by mid-September. Now, that’s a big goal for anyone, let alone a 7 year old. So, we had to break it down. We determined if he aimed to read 15 books a month for June/July/August, he would more than meet his goal. And if he read a book a day, he’d definitely blow that goal out of the water. That’s just a simple example from our every day life, but as adults we can do the exact same thing. Take our big goals and break them down step by step.
Page 3 of the Guide is all about creating quick wins. I really believe in this concept in many areas of life, but especially in the area of setting goals. If we can create momentum that builds and grows, that momentum will carry us where we want to go.
Here’s the question to ask: “What is something you can do, right now, today that will bring you closer to meeting each of your goals?” Take some time to consider this question. Write down a quick win for each of the three goals you listed on page 2 of the Guide. Then here’s my challenge to you: go and do it. Knock out those quick wins. That will create momentum and momentum is what we need to reach our goals.
Page 4 of the Guide is all about what to do when a goal isn’t working. This has happened to me a lot. I set a goal and somewhere along the way I get off track. It falls to the wayside. Or – and this is why I talked about creating quick wins – I don’t even take the first step to reaching it.
So, if you’ve followed the Guide and a goal still isn’t working, here are some questions to ask to get you back on track:
Have your priorities shifted? If so, how and why? This is an important question because, if your goal is based on a priority you hold and the goal isn’t working anymore, perhaps your priority has shifted some how. Perhaps answering this question will also help you see the goal you set wasn’t connected to a priority you hold in the first place. Either way this question is a win.
Next question: “How can I tweak or update this goal to make it work?” We don’t always want to nix the entire goal. Maybe we can change something (small even) about the goal that will make it applicable again. Maybe the way we set the goal, the perimeters need to be updated.
Next question: “Do I just need to let this goal go?” If you’ve answered the first two questions and the goal still isn’t working, then ask this. Sometimes we just need to let goals go. That’s fine, there’s nothing wrong with that. There is bravery in admitting when we’ve been heading in the wrong direction and then course correcting instead of stubbornly continuing down the wrong path.
Final question: “If I need to let this goal go, what goal can I replace it with?” Let’s not create a vacuum affect, let’s fill that empty goal slot with a goal that moves our feet in the right direction. This is where I’d encourage you to go back to the first page of the guide and walk through those questions again.
That is The Goals Guide in a nutshell. I really believe this Guide is a simple approach to setting goals you’ll actually reach. These are goal setting principles I’ve applied in my own life, that I’ve actually used and seen be successful.
One final note: just start. Don’t wait for the “perfect time” or the “perfect conditions” because they won’t ever come.
Here’s another example from my every day life: starting my podcast. I got the idea on a road trip in the first quarter of the year and jotted a quick note to look into it. It piqued my interest and seemed like it might be a good fit. I thought it could be something I would enjoy that might also work well to reach my target audience – you, the every day mama who is busy raising her kiddos, running her home, doing her thing and needs to be able to listen/learn on the go. Well, I reached a point in June where I realized: If I don’t just start, I might never start. So I just jumped in. I had no idea what I was doing, but I recorded my first episode and it took off from there.
Have any questions for me? Leave them in the comments and I’ll be happy to answer! You’ve got this, mama. Never fear! One breath, one step, one day at a time.
Listen to the companion podcast episodes here and here. It’s a two part series.
For more self-care goodness, come join me on Instagram. And if you haven’t joined my email list yet, that’s a great place to find more of the same. Check out the side bar (or scroll all the way down if you’re on mobile) to view all the freebies I’ve created just with you in mind. I hope you find something helpful.
It’s my hope that this post will serve as a guide to caring for yourself during early postpartum and beyond.
I hope that it will help you or a mama you know reclaim this precious season and take the time to recover, heal and adjust.
I hope that it will make your entrance into motherhood (whether it’s the first or seventh time) a sacred time of true soul, mind and body self-care.
My Postpartum Experiences
I’ve had three very different birth experiences so far.
My first was a homebirth that ended in a transfer to the hospital. My second was at a birth center. And my third was a home birth/water birth that was absolutely amazing.
Just as I’ve had three different birth experiences, I’ve also had three different postpartum experiences. I don’t expect the fourth (coming soon!) to be any different.
Unlike birth plans that may have to be completely thrown out the window, I believe we have a little more control over our postpartum experience. A little thought and preparation can go a long way in amplifying our recovery, healing and adjustment. Each of my postpartum experiences have gotten progressively better as I’ve learned better how to care for myself in that precious season.
Observing and honoring early postpartum and the 4th Trimester (those first 12 weeks) is so very important. Yet, it’s something we woefully neglect as a society. So many other cultures observe this beautiful season, but in the Western world we seem to have forgotten about supporting the mother through this vulnerable time of recovering, healing and adjustment.
The baby gets so much focus, care and attention after birth. That’s as it should be. But I know from personal experience I put exponentially much more time and thought and money into prepping for my firstborn…and I hardly even considered what I would need for recovery, healing and adjusting during the postpartum season.
I rushed into motherhood like I had to prove that I was “okay,” that I could handle it.
Like staying in bed with my new baby to recover, heal and adjust was a sign of weakness.
Like pushing myself too far, too fast was a sign of strength and capability.
But it wasn’t. All the lies I believed about “keeping up” and getting back in shape and returning to normal were detrimental to my soul, mind and body as a new mother.
It’s my hope we can rediscover the beauty of the postpartum season. To take that time not only to bond with our baby and learn how to care for a new precious life, but also to care for ourselves in deep and needed ways that will pave the way for a smoother transition into a new season.
Specific Ways I’m Preparing for Early Postpartum
First, I’m going to be sharing what I am doing to prepare for postpartum this fourth time. I’ll be sharing many resources and tips that I’ve discovered through my first three experiences.
Most of what I will share are my tried and trues. Some are brand-new to me. With each baby I up my postpartum game because I learn something new each time.
Here are some specific ways I’m preparing for postpartum:
Pre-Gaming the Self-Care
Before my third baby I saw another mama share about how she layered on self-care during the last few weeks before baby. I LOVED that idea. Those final weeks can feel so long and uncomfortable. I determined that I was going to make the most of them, too.
Here are some ways I like to pre-game my self-care:
Go get or give myself a mani/pedi
Get out alone
Nap as much as possible
Schedule mama dates with a couple good friends
Take long baths
Get a pre-natal massage and/or go to the chiro
It doesn’t have to be anything fancy or expensive. Just those little extras that will be difficult to do once a newborn arrives.
Cozi-fying our bedroom
I’m creating a tea/coffee/snack station out of a coffee table we have in our room. You could set up a simple bar cart or even use a dresser for this. I’m getting clear trays to protect surfaces and keep everything organized. I’m planning to have a French press, electric kettle and frother. I have baskets for my teas, coffee, drink ingredients and nutrient dense snacks.
A sweet friend gifted me a small refrigerator she no longer needed and I’ve been doing a happy dance ever since. It’s going to be in our bedroom to the left of the coffee table. I’ll stock creamer, Daydream Dessert, special drinks, quick snacks, and any tonics and refrigerated supplements in there for easy access. Have I mentioned how excited I am for this!?
We replaced old, leaky shower heads, a broken vent/fan and I got a new, cozy bath rug.
I’m getting a tray for my bedside table for the daily re-fuels of healing drinks, foods, supplements, etc.
I got an under the bed wire basket to keep all the baby things close at hand. I plan to use our bed as the changing station so that I don’t have to go anywhere.
I got a small basket for nursing supplies to keep beside my bed and one for the back of the toilet to keep all my immediate postpartum supplies.
We’re moving the TV into our room, what can I say. Watching HGTV and Food Network PLUS all the Christmas movies during those long newborn nursing sessions sounds amazing.
Setting Up Help Where I Need It
My mom, bless her and thank the Lord for her, comes for a few weeks when I have my babies. It’s amazing and I will be forever grateful for the HUGE part she’s played in my postpartum recoveries. If you don’t have a close family member who is able to come, definitely check into hiring a postpartum doula. I realize this is an extra expense, but even if you only have that one-on-one help for the first couple of weeks, it will make an immense difference.
I have asked our babysitters to come once a week for an afternoon for the foreseeable future. I might double that after the holidays and my mom is gone and my husband is back at work. I plan to use this time to nap with baby, sneak in a bath or long shower, basically for #soulmindbodyselfcare.
I’ve found a house cleaning company and plan to have them come at least once a month, possibly more for a little while. They’ve already done a deep clean and it was the first time my house has been clean all at once in…forever. It was so nice. I rest best in tidy, calm surroundings. Since I know this about myself (and know that I will otherwise be tempted to be cleaning when I should be resting), this is a needed act of self-care.
I’m setting up a few meal delivery services (and getting a deep freezer for the garage). I like Hungry Root and I’m going to try Daily Harvest and Splendid Spoon. None of these are sponsored. And I’ll let you know how I like them after I’ve tried them this time. I’m thrilled to have options for clean, healthy, healing foods that will be quick to prepare, especially once I’m flying solo during the days.
I have all my essentials on subscription so that they come right to my door. Then I don’t have to remember to order something I need/use regularly in those blurry newborn days. This includes: diapers/wipes, household supplies, needed supplements, our CSA box, etc.
Taking a Baby Sleep Course
My first baby was an average sleeper. My second was not a sleeper unless she was attached to me. My third was a total dream baby/fluke, the best sleeper ever and I am spoiled. I’m not expecting a repeat, ha, so I’m preparing by taking a baby sleep course.
I’ve never been a proponent of sleep training. I like to have my babies with me for the first six months at least and then in our room (or large walk-in closet) for as long as needed. I also don’t want to jeopardize my milk supply by night weaning early.
So, I’m currently working my way through Taking Cara Babies First Five Months Bundle. So far it seems to be a very gentle approach and breast-feeding friendly. So reassuring and easy to follow while also opening my eyes to some missteps I made with my second born who did not want to sleep unless attached to me.
Whatever kind of sleeper this fourth babe is, I will feel a lot more at ease knowing I have a ton of sleep tools to employ if/when needed. I’ll let you know how it goes after I’ve had ample time to apply what I’m learning.
Planning to Take the Full 4th Trimester Off
This is so, so important. Our society has led us to believe that postpartum is just the first 6 weeks post-baby.
Nope.
Nothing could be farther from the truth. Certainly those first six weeks are integral, but observing the full 4th Trimester (those first 12 weeks) is key to long term recovery, healing and adjustment as mothers. And it shouldn’t end there. My mom has always said, it took 9 months to grow the baby, give yourself at least 9 months to recover, heal and adjust. Amen! And, personally, I always start feeling more like myself closer to the 12-16 month mark.
I take the full 4th Trimester off by:
Not putting any pressure on myself to work out or “get my body back,” even once I’m technically cleared to do so. I do TVA/deep core breathing exercises, walks and maybe some gentle stretching. That’s it. Even beyond those 12 weeks, I really listen to my body. Intense work outs right out of the gate can really tax the adrenals, especially if you haven’t replenished your stores, balanced your hormones and if you’re not getting adequate restorative sleep.
Not planning anything. Seriously. I don’t plan anything. Especially for the first month, but even the second two months, I don’t schedule regular events or play dates or anything that would take us out of the house unless we feel up to it. The big idea is: nothing on the calendar or my to do list beyond taking care of myself and my babies for those first 12 weeks.
I’m going to be pulling back here and on Instagram and the podcast and my email list. Basically taking maternity leave, but coming and going as I feel up to it. I don’t have any hard and fast goals. No pressure to show up or produce. I love what I share through Soul Mind Body Selfcare, it’s part of who I am, but I really want to take the 4th Trimester to tune in, do some learning (courses and books, etc), rest my mind and allow my inspiration to be refreshed.
Also, a little note:once postpartum, always postpartum. We can’t really put a time frame on postpartum recovery. If you didn’t have a good postpartum season with your baby(ies), whether it was a year ago or ten years ago – it’s not too late! It’s never too late to start caring for yourself. Start now, start today with your recovery, healing and adjusting. You can still apply many of the things I’m sharing in this article. At some point, I will also be talking about what I do later in the postpartum to continue the wave of recovery, healing and adjusting.
Specific Items I’m Prepping + Stocking for Postpartum
What I’m Prepping + Stocking for Right After Birth + Early Postpartum
A first meal. Whether it’s in the crockpot or freezer so it can be quickly warmed, I love to have something that is protein and carb heavy. My last two babies I’ve had a lasagna/pasta dish as my first meal and it just tasted so good. My first baby I had saltine crackers because the hospital cafeteria wasn’t open at 2am. Bleh.
Earth Mama Herbal sitz bath.I have an actual sitz bath for my toilet, but you can also sit in a shallow tub of water or add a larger amount of herbs if you prefer a full soak. Side note: this is also lovely for mama/baby bonding and (clear with your provider), but I soak with my babies even before their umbilical cord stump falls off, the herbs are so healing and soothing.
Earth Mama perineal spray. I swear by this stuff. I get 2-3 bottles. It’s so healing without any yucky chemicals.
Gaia Herbs natural laxative. Trying this out this time. I wanted something natural and gentle, but I definitely need laxative help in those first few weeks.
Items I’m Stocking Specifically for Breastfeeding:
A latch assist – new to me – and I’m actually using this now to prepare. My midwife said it’s best to start using it around 33-34 weeks so it does take a little forethought.
Nipple shield for the first week or so, until we establish a solid latch.
Medela Breast shells to keep the bra pads from sticking and allow the air to circulate around the nipple between feedings – new to me but I’m willing to try anything that makes those first weeks easier.
La Vie Lactation Massager for plugged ducts. Also new to me, but I had the worst time with plugged ducts with my last baby. I’m going to be addressing that in other ways this time as well, but want to have this on hand, too.
Haakaa silicone manual breast pump for catching let downs and middle of the night pump seshs in those early weeks when my milk comes in. A few notes: I have always used the Medela Harmony Manual Breast Pump and really like it. I’m intrigued by the Haakaa because it has less parts to keep clean and uses suction which will be amazing if it actually works for me. I’ve never used an electric pump. I don’t try to build a stash. I’ll maybe end up with 6-8 bags of milk in the freezer from those first weeks while my milk is regulating. I keep those on hand for when the kids or my husband want to help feed the baby or if I’m out a bit past nursing time at some point in those first months. But I find it’s easier to simply nurse and not worry about pumping or building a stash. I know not every mama can take that approach, but that’s been my story.
I make a simple saline soak to soothe cracked or irritated nipples. I’ve used this method the last two babies and it really works to heal up nipples quickly.
What Herbs/Supplements/Foods/Drinks I’m Stocking for Postpartum:
Tonics/Teas/Herbs:
Loose leaf teas – Stinging Nettle Leaf, Red Raspberry Leaf, Dandelion Root and Lemon Balm. I love Mountain Rose Herbs to purchase these.
Milk Moon – I’m getting their postpartum restorative tonic
I will continue taking an adrenal tonic my midwife has give me, herbs to support my varicose veins (thankfully they begin to clear up in those early weeks!) and keepmy homemade elderberry and echinacea tincture close at hand to keep my immune system strong.
Supplements:
ProgestPure– I was taking this natural progesterone supplement when I got pregnant and have been taking it through out my pregnancy. My cycle always returns ridiculously early, like 2-3 months pp, even though I nurse on demand. My midwife said that can sometimes be caused by low progesterone, so this time I’m going to be supplementing.
Quicksilver Methylated Liquid B complex – I am most excited about this one (if you can be excited about a supplement, ha) because I’ve never taken a B Complex during postpartum. I am so curious to see if it helps with low energy as well as postpartum hair loss.
Grass-fed beef liver capsules, so amazing for boosting iron and B12 and supporting energy levels and overall well being.
Of course, I’ll also have my wellness arsenal stocked, too. Especially since this early postpartum season will be in the colder months.
Foods:
High quality bone broth for sipping and soup-making Organic, local raw dairy – milk, cream, yogurt, kefir, etc Citrus anything and everything Root veggies and especially beets (TMI but they help me go!) Ginger, turmeric, garlic Day Dream Desserts
Drinks:
Ingredients for smoothies (drinking at room temp to keep my body warm to promote healthy circulation and healing) Golden Milk paste for healing golden milk lattes Foursigmatic hot cocoa with reishi Live kombucha soda for that fiz with probiotics
Prepare as much beforehand as you possibly can. A good postpartum season isn’t going to just happen, you have to plan for it. BUT. If you are reading this while postpartum and feeling discouraged, don’t be! Start right where you are with what you have. Identify your top three needs and brainstorm with your husband how you can practically meet those needs ASAP.
Set clear boundaries with family/friends who might want to visit. Designate a gate keeper at the hospital and/or at home. Put a sign on the front door saying “Mama and baby are resting, thanks for stopping by, we will be in touch soon,” or something to that affect. Communicate your desires clearly with your husband and anyone else who will be caring for you. Decide how much time you need undisturbed (one day? one week? one month?) If people want to bring food or gifts, tell them thank you and to please leave it on the door step unless you are up for visiting. If people do come in for a visit, have a list of things that need to be done so that when they ask how they can help, you don’t have to think. Above all, do what you need to do in order to prioritize your recovery and bonding with baby. Be kind but firm. Don’t be afraid to say no. You don’t owe anyone anything.
A few more…
Have a plan to focus on replenishing nutrients, balancing hormones and adequately support your adrenals.
Keep the lymphatic and detox systems moving/working with: castor oil packs, dry brushing, acupuncture, sauna, chiro, massage, etc. Have care providers and contact info ready to go and appointments established/scheduled if you are able.
Nancy Anderson’s Ab Rehab and TVA breathing exercises. See a pelvic floor specialist if you have persistent issues. Better to take care of things early on, but even years postpartum you can heal!
Even after nursing babies for 60 months collectively (WHAT?!), I still feel like a novice. Especially when it comes to nursing newborns. I like to say, I’m great at nursing toddlers, but I suck at nursing newborns. Ha. When they’re totally dependent, don’t know what the heck they’re doing (feeling the same, babes, feeling the same), need you to support their body completely while you’re sleep deprived and exhausted… It’s just a lot.
So, my #1 tip would be to be prepared and have plenty of support. Gather all your resources, stock all your supplies and line up any help you might need. Breastfeeding is natural, but it might not come naturally. It will probably take several weeks of adjustment (especially if it’s your first) and a whole lot of perseverance, hard work and dedication. It’s both the hardest and most beautiful thing I’ve ever done apart from giving birth and raising my kiddos.
Bonus tips:
Every time we have a baby, I put together what I call the big sister/big brother bag for the older sibling(s). We pull it out after the baby is born and tell them it’s our celebration of baby arriving. It makes them feel special and thought of and makes baby’s arrival fun. It helps ease the transition a little. This time I think we’re also going to get balloons and cupcakes to really do it up. Make it a birth-day party.
I put items in the bag that will help entertain the kiddos while I recover. This time I’m putting in a ton of new Christmas books, their Christmas pajamas, a washable coloring mat from The Modern Cloth with washable markers, Christmas mugs, new mini ornaments so they can decorate their tree, etc.
I like to have any info for newborn care (even after three babies, each newborn season always feels like the first time) and any appointments that need to be scheduled for me or the baby in those early weeks ready to go. It’s hard to make decisions in those early days/weeks when you’re sleep deprived. I don’t want to have to remember what to do if my baby is crying and won’t stop or who I need to call to schedule that first chiro apt, etc. I keep everything in a folder for easy access and stock any homeopathies or other remedies I might need.
Have any questions for me? Leave them in the comments and I’ll be happy to answer! You’ve got this, mama. Never fear! One breath, one step, one day at a time.
For more self-care goodness, join my email list. Check out the side bar (or scroll all the way down if you’re on mobile) to view all the freebies I’ve created just with you in mind. I hope you find something helpful.
We all begin our self-care journey somewhere. It’s like a lot of things in life: you might not recognize where you began – what paradigm shift or pivotal moment brought you to the starting line. But years down the road you’ll look back and go “ahhhh, that was it. The beginning.”
That was certainly true for me. I didn’t even know I was on a self-care journey until I was five years in. Looking back I can clearly see each paradigm shift.
Me with my first son. After a very long labor + traumatic birth. So in love but completely + totally overwhelmed in every way.
I didn’t know anything about self-care until after I had my first son in 2013. I had come off several stressful years in my late teens and early twenties, earning my bachelors, working two jobs, putting myself through an intense master program, getting married and having a baby in quick succession. It was a lot of stress (even though a lot of it was obviously good!) and not a lot of recovery time. I remember feeling like I was getting sick one fall while I was deep in the trenches of earning my masters. I told myself I didn’t have time and I just kept pushing forward. That’s just one example of many.
Add to that: I didn’t know how to care for myself even if I’d wanted to. Period. I didn’t know what that looked like. I treated my soul, mind and body like a machine: they did what I told it to and that meant I never really stopped.
Even after my son was born, I didn’t stop. I was up and around just a couple days after a very long, intense and traumatic birth. The midwife was horrified. I remember going to Target, my newborn in a moby wrap, way too soon because I just thought that’s what I was supposed to do. Get back to life, get back to normal.
Oh, man. I could write a book, just on that. How as a society we have lost the beautiful, vulnerable, necessary healing time that is postpartum. I had no clue. No clue what a healing postpartum season looked like. No clue that there was no getting back to my old “normal.” No clue that I had nothing to prove, no one to impress, by pushing myself too hard, too fast.
In fact, it wasn’t until I was around 15 months postpartum that everything began to catch up with me. I was still breastfeeding, had suffered an early miscarriage and my husband was away for six months going through training for a new job that would move us to the other side of the country.
It slowly starting dawning on me that: caring for my baby was only part of the motherhood equation; the other part was learning how to care for myself as well.
This was my first big, paradigm shift. The beginning of my self-care journey. I wasn’t well physically, emotionally or mentally. Our of sheer necessity, I found myself at a naturopath, trying to figure out why I felt like I was falling apart. During the two hour intake session, I ended up sharing things I’d never shared with anyone. I realized then I probably should have been in therapy long before. It was the beginning for me.
Paradigm Shift #2: A Slow Awakening
Me with my daughter. After a very emotionally charged labor and beautiful, birth center birth. I was exhausted on every level. Our postpartum season was good but way too short.
After seeing that first naturopath, I took baby steps towards addressing some physical issues I was experiencing. Skin issues, hair loss, inability to concentrate, wired but tired, prone to depression…so many things pointed to the fact my adrenals were shot. What I couldn’t know at the time was that this was only the tip of the iceberg.
I did start to feel some micro improvements, but I still didn’t have any clue what self-care was or the depth to which I needed it. I did what I could with the knowledge I had at the time. Which is all anyone can do, which is why this is called a journey.
Fast forward to six months postpartum with my daughter at the beginning of 2016. I had been through a super stressful year prior. We had moved across country for my husband’s new job, away from family. We had been through house hunting, found a place and had been working non-stop to fix it up. All while my husband worked 12 hour days and I managed the renovations. Add to that: pregnancy, wrangling a toddler, an emotionally intense delivery, extended family issues…
That time still blurs together. I was overwhelmed, stressed, not sleeping, and I still hadn’t learned what I needed to thrive, how to meet my own needs or how to ask for help. Before I had become pregnant with my daughter, I had been writing my heart out, building a blog, and an email list and I literally hit “delete” on all of it. Just like I had hit delete on all the parts of life that made me…well, me.
I hit rock bottom. I found myself at my parents for a few weeks and, for the first time, I was able to rest, to sit back while my children were cared for by others and actually see them, see myself, have space to think. That’s when I realized again that I needed help.
I found a naturopath in our new area and dove deeper into functional medicine. I still went into my first appointment with a shotgun approach, not really knowing what to ask for or what was priority. Once again I took baby steps towards caring for my physical body. I was diagnosed with candida and got on a regime to treat that. I did a Whole 30 and learned so much about eating whole foods, reading labels and how to cook a lot more things from scratch. Through that whole process I discovered my body [and my skin! It completely cleared up] did so much better without conventional dairy.
Addressing the physical was good. It brought me to a place where I could actually start thinking about what I required to thrive. How I should care for myself. What I needed most. It helped clear some of the brain fog and the nagging physical symptoms that distracted me from working on deeper issues.
The clearer mind brought me to counseling and starting to do the hard work of setting healthy boundaries. I am not by nature a strong willed person, but I became strong willed when it came to my own self-care. I learned the importance of saying no, of prioritizing myself and my family over what others thought or wanted. I realized I had to stop playing the martyr. No one could read my mind. I had to get to know myself better, understand what made me thrive, and learn to meet those needs and how to communicate them. I had to take responsibility for caring for myself.
I began practicing yoga and I fell in love with how it married movement and breath and brought restoration to not just my physical health, but my my mental health as well. I’ve been practicing yoga for almost five years now and nothing helps me feel more at home in my body or my mind faster.
Around the same time I started yoga, I embarked on a mission to not just organize our home, but completely declutter it. Get rid of everything that we didn’t love or use. Of course, my mission wasn’t quite that clear at first. I just knew that too much stuff overwhelmed me and I was tired of trying to organize it only to turn around and find it a jumbled mess two minutes later. So I started decluttering, space by space. Month by month. It’s been a journey in and of it’s self. A long learning process. Like peeling away the layers of an onion. But, truly, decluttering our home, our schedule, my expectations, my brain, everything has been a huge game changer in my self-care journey.
Paradigm Shift #3: Starting to Share My Journey
Me with my third baby, our second boy. Having him felt like coming home. He brought healing that I didn’t know I needed, on levels I didn’t know existed.
The spring my third baby was born was one of the most beautiful seasons of our life for so many reasons. We had just finished a long, arduous process of selling our house, moving to a new town, living in a rental paying double payments, battling lots of sickness (I was sick for two solid weeks before my son was born, coughing until my ribs ached, sleeping sitting straight up in bed at 9 months pregnant, ha).
My son was born, my first successful home waterbirth. It was quick and intense and beautiful. He was perfect and so was our postpartum experience thanks to all the many lessons I had learned and my mom and my husband caring for me, the kids and the house so seamlessly. I spent the first two weeks in bed with my baby and gave myself a full 12 weeks before I started any exercise beyond walking. I let my body heal and didn’t try to rush. It felt so freeing. We finally sold our house and found a new house. The cherry on top was that the baby was our best sleeper yet. It all felt like such a gift.
When my third was about nine months old, I started intentionally sharing my self-care journey on Instagram. The more I shared, the more I heard from other mamas how desperately they craved self-care but didn’t know what it looked like or how to implement it. So, I kept sharing everything I had learned and was learning and one day Soul Mind Body Selfcare was born. A few months later I started this blog so I could have a place to write that gave me more space than an Instagram caption. I’ve slowly, steadily grown my mama tribe and hope to continue growing.
Paradigm Shift #4: Self-Care Isn’t Just the Feel Good Stuff
Nursing my sweet third born for the last time. I was about to start some intensive protocols to heal my gut. I also knew deep down my body needed a good, long break.
A series of comprehensive tests revealed/confirmed I had borderline Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis, multiple food sensitivities, leaky gut and two different gut infections. I went on a strict elimination diet for two months, cutting out several reactive foods including coffee, alcohol, eggs, yeast and gluten. I followed several different protocols to heal my leaky gut, detox my liver, support my adrenals and get rid of my gut infections. In order to do the protocols for the gut infections, I needed to wean my third baby at 16 months. Which isn’t early by any means, but he could have kept going and it made me sad not to be able to nurse him for as long as he wanted.
But sometimes self-care looks like sacrifice. During the fall and winter of 2019 I really ramped up my self-care on all the levels. I started meditating, dry brushing, visiting the sauna, using a castor oil pack, utilizing adaptogens, practicing moon cycling, getting massage, taking regular detox baths. You name it, I was doing it. We started trying for another baby and I wanted to be as healthy and strong as possible.
Of course, in January I (along with all the family) got the horrible flu that was going around. It set me way back. I didn’t feel like myself for weeks and was still dealing with lung congestion, low energy and relapses a month later. A month after that I experienced hair loss due to the stress of the sickness. Which is just amazing…I don’t even want to know what it would have done to my body if I hadn’t already been so focused on my health and self-care on every level.
A few weeks after that, in mid-March of 2020, we found out I was expecting. Not exactly how I’d hoped to step into a new pregnancy. And it so happened to be the same week of the full moon, day light savings and when all of the Covid-19 stuff hit the fan. It was an intense time on a spiritual, emotional and mental level…let alone on the physical level.
All the lessons I had learned over the previous 8 years came full circle. It felt a little like ground zero once again. Where the rubber meets the road. Almost like a new beginning of some sort. I’m still navigating it. Because this is a journey. There’s no finish line in this life and that’s okay. The beauty and growth and transformation is in the process.
To recap, here are four big lessons I’ve learned so far on my self-care journey:
Big Lesson #1:
Addressing the physical is so necessary and might need to happen first before you can think about anything else. Healing physically will bring you to a place where you can actually start thinking about healing emotionally and mentally and deciding exactly what you require to thrive.
Big Lesson #2:
Setting boundaries is key. You have to learn to say no. You have to learn to make yourself and your immediate family priority over anything and everyone else.
Big Lesson #3:
On that note: stop playing the martyr. No one can read your mind. No one is going to magically meet your needs without you asking. Ultimately you have to take responsibility for caring for yourself. Determine what you need to thrive and then meet your needs or communicate them clearly to those who can.
Big Lesson #4:
One step at a time. One day at a time. Nothing worthwhile happens over night. It’s called a journey for a reason. There’s no medal for the first person across the finish line because there is no finish line. At least not in this world. What matters is that you are learning and growing and moving forward one step at a time.
Have any questions for me? Leave them in the comments and I’ll be happy to answer! You’ve got this, mama. Never fear! One breath, one step, one day at a time.
For more self-care goodness, come join me on Instagram. And if you haven’t joined my email list yet, that’s a great place to find more of the same. Check out the side bar (or scroll all the way down if you’re on mobile) to view all the freebies I’ve created just with you in mind. I hope you find something helpful.
It’s that time of year! Fall, a fresh season, the cooling of and shortening of the days, all the cozy layers, candles burning, lots of hygge vibes. I love summer, just as I do all the seasons for one reason or another, but fall has my heart.
It’s a leaning in. A circling of the wagons. A focus on home and heart and time with family. It’s about hibernating and recuperating from the busier, longer, hotter days of summer. It’s the natural ebb to the flow.
And it’s also a wonderful time to layer on the self-care. I’m going to share several of the ways I care for myself in this season. It doesn’t have to be complicated. A little goes a long way.
Besides stocking up on high quality K2/D3 drops, I make a point to step outside first thing in the morning (usually with my warm lemon water in hand) and turn my face to the sun. Even if the sun isn’t shining, it’s still beneficial for resetting your circadian rhythm.
But if it’s too chilly out or the sun is behind the clouds, I will open all the blinds and turn on my “happy” light in the kitchen while I make breakfast. On nice days when the temperatures are still moderate, I lay out while the kiddos play and get a solid 20 minutes of sunshine mid-day.
All that to say, I keep lots of fresh ginger, turmeric, garlic + onions on hand to use in soups, smoothies and warm drinks. Speaking of smoothies, don’t underestimate the nutritional power punch of the daily smoothie in keeping the immune system strong. This one is my favorite.
I also make sure to always have a fresh batch of elderberry syrup in the fridge. I use this recipe and also add the peel of one organic lemon, about an inch of peeled, fresh turmeric + about 10 whole peppercorns during the simmer step. This funnel + strainer in one makes this recipe a breeze.
I stock Echinacea/Goldenseal drops, Vitamin C gummies, and Vitamin D drops (along with a host of other remedies). I also make sure to have some ColdCalm, cough syrup and good teas on hand.
3.) Keep moving!
When the weather starts to get cooler, I naturally tend to want to stay inside more. Hunker down. Stay in my pajamas and putter. But I’ve found that consistently moving my body really boosts my mood + energy, especially in the fall transition. Even just ten minutes a day makes a huge difference.
This fall I’m committing to at least 10 minutes a day of pilates or yoga. I aim to walk 2-3 x’s per week and I love to hike our local “mountain” a couple times each month. I’m always amazed at how good I feel after just a little movement.
4.) Schedule a weekly detox bath.
Okay, maybe more like bi-weekly. I love the simple tool of a detox bath all year around. But especially in the cooler months, it not only delivers on the self-care front it also boosts immunity + helps my body heal faster if I’m fighting something.
Check out this post for my recipe for a perfect detox bath, but currently I’m loving a mix of epsom salts (don’t be afraid to dump them in, it takes a good amount to make a difference), raw apple cider vinegar (about 1 cup) and some sort of oil – coconut, essential, body – doesn’t matter. Just something moisturizing, soothing and grounding.
5.) Take the time to reassess your goals for the year.
I love using the fall transition as a fresh opportunity to reassess the goals I set for the year, revamp where needed, dial down and get super specific so I can finish out the year on a high note.
So, take 10-15 minutes, a pad and a pen and write out your top 5 goals for the remainder of the year. Then break those goals down into action steps by month, week and day. Make them bite-size and they will be much easier to accomplish.
If you need some extra help or inspiration, grab my free Goals Guide that will walk you through the process.
6.) Come up with some seasonal meal ideas.
I’m not a big meal plan person. I take more of a “meal ideas” approach. I go through my favorite cookbooks, comb through my Pinterest board and write down all the recipes I want to try separated by breakfast, dinner, snacks, and desserts. We almost always do leftovers or a lunch board for lunch, so I don’t worry about that category too much.
My all time favorite cookbook (I use it almost every day) is Simply Real Eating. Besides Pinterest, this is where a majority of my meal ideas come from. So good!
As much as it’s good to get out in the sunshine + move your body daily, it’s totally okay + even healthy to embrace the season of hibernating that’s coming. Don’t fight it. If you feel like staying close to home, stay close to home. If you need to “circle the wagons,” circle the wagons. You’ve most likely been going + doing all spring and summer, it’s good to slow down, pull in, rest + get refilled.
It’s okay to get some cozy pajamas (and wear them until noon), buy a new pair of slippers + a chunky cardigan, get out those warm blankets for the living room, light the candles and make some new fall blends for the diffuser. Embrace the hygge, embrace the hibernating.
9.) Start a new Bible study.
It’s a brand new season, so it’s the perfect opportunity to dig into a fresh book of the Bible or topical study. I love She Reads Truth and have since they started years ago. They have so many amazing studies to choose from. You don’t have to purchase anything either. You can follow along on their website for free.
I recently discovered The Daily Grace Co. and it looks like they have some fantastic studies, too.
Right now I use a simple ESV journal Bible and I’m working my way slowly through the Psalms. They are very fitting for current times. The Bible as a whole is just always relevant, living and active.
10.) Snag some fresh books.
I’ve always been a library gal. I like to check a book out and then give it back, no cost and nothing to store or care for. BUT over the last few months, when libraries closed, I started slowly building my own personal library of reference books. Books I will use and reuse and read and re-read.
Creating a capsule for each season is my favorite. It’s so much fun to re-invent + re-imagine the clothing I have and then re-incorporate it into the next season as much as possible. And then – the best part! – shopping to fill in any gaps.
While you’re creating your capsule, plan to give away/throw away/sell as necessary. It’s always refreshing to start a new season with a cleaned out + pared down closet.
My first stop for capsule inspiration is Pinterest – check out my style board here. I also go more in-depth on how to create a capsule wardrobe you love here.
There you have it! Eleven ways to take your #soulmindbodyselfcare into fall. I hope you enjoyed them.
Have any questions? Leave a comment! I’d love to hear from you.
Nothing has been a bigger game changer for my life and my motherhood than finding specific ways to simplify so that I have more time (and energy) for what matters most.
These 5 things I’m about to share with you have come after nearly 8 years of motherhood. I’m hoping they will save other younger mamas lots of time and angst. Let them encourage and inspire you to make your own simple changes, too.
This isn’t an all inclusive list. What is your favorite way to simplify to create more time for the things that matter most?
Need extra help in simplifying? Creating rhythms is so important. Grab the free guide today!
Let’s dive in…
1.) Declutter Everything
And I mean absolutely everything. All of your physical surroundings, but also your brain, your schedule, your priorities, right down to the number of tabs you have open on your computer. Everything. No man left behind.
Beyond the obvious decluttering Marie Kondo-style, here are a few ways I’ve also found to simplify my life via decluttering:
Toy rotation. Yes, this is even for you if you consider yourself fairly minimalist already. The basic idea is to have specific storage areas for toys. Ours are an IKEA system in the kids’ room, a cedar chest for their train set, a hall closet that contains all their art and games and puzzles and then a coat closet we’ve transformed into LEGO storage. Then each child gets a bin (right now the two boys share one) that houses “extras.” Every month or so we rotate, one for one style, so that old toys feel new again and there’s never too much down at one time. Listen to the podcast on taming the toy chaos HERE.
Eliminate pain points. If I find that a particular area (example: our laundry room/mud room) is causing me particular angst then I focus in there. I declutter, rearrange, rethink so that it starts working for us again.
Remove duplicates. I don’t have two of very many things at all. I keep my favorite, the very best and let go of the rest. The only exceptions are seasonal items.
Cut down on repetitive actions. One example from my personal life are throw pillows. I love a good throw pillow. But just not on our couch. I had them there for a while and found I was picking them up off the floor literally half a dozen times a day. Nope. Don’t need that in my life. So I moved them to our bed and they fit perfectly. Problem solved.
2.) Automate and Delegate
Two of my favorite words in motherhood. Ha. But truly, they are key to simplifying and saving your sanity.
Here are a few ways I apply them to every day life:
Get the kiddos involved. Kids love to feel needed (who doesn’t), but even if they’re not thrilled at the idea of helping, involve them anyway. I am always telling my kids, I am just one person. There are five of us in the home. We are all a team and we all have to pitch in order to be successful. We each have to do our part. My seven year old cleans the kids’ bathroom, folds laundry, empties the dishwasher, makes simple meals, pulls weeds, waters the garden, etc. My almost five year old helps with the laundry as well, emptying the dishwasher, vacuuming, pulling weeds, etc. Even my two year old puts away silverware, puts his clothes away, sweeps up small messes, etc. It may not seem like help at first, but before you know it, your kids will be helping to lighten the family load.
Find a reliable babysitter. I know this can feel so overwhelming. I am very picky about who watches my kids, so not just anyone will do. I start by asking someone I trust who they recommend. Word of mouth always wins for me. We currently have a sister duo who the kids love and I can trust.
Utilize grocery delivery or pick up. Seriously. I rarely step foot in a grocery store anymore. There’s no need to if you live in an area with grocery delivery and/or pick up options. Yesterday I had Instacart deliver groceries from my local market and Costco with in 15 minutes of each other. Fridge cleaned out, restocked, done for the week. Praise.
Set up intentional subscriptions. I used to resist them, but now they are my best friend. The trick is only setting up subscriptions for items and services that you already use on the regular. If you find you’re not using it, simply cancel. I keep a running list of my current subscriptions so I can monitor them. Here are some of my tried and trues: Branch Basics for non-toxic cleaning supplies, Butcher Box for the best meat, my local CSA for fresh, seasonal veggies, fruits, dairy, and baked goods, Honest Company for diapers and wipes, Mary Ruth’s Organics for amazing supplements for the entire family.
Automatic bill pay. Not much more to say here. I have all our bills set to automatically withdraw. I still get paper statements and review them, but don’t have to worry about missing payment deadlines.
Invest in a robot vacuum. I mean, you can invest in a house cleaner, too. I just haven’t made that leap yet because I honestly find cleaning therapeutic AND it’s hard to find a house cleaner who will use my non-toxic products. SO, a robot vacuum is one of my biggest hacks (besides the one load, one space rhythm). I’ve had this basic robot vacuum for almost two years now and it is still going strong. I run it a few times a week and am always amazed how much it picks up.
3.) Create Rhythms
This is a constant refrain of mine, but for good reason. Rhythms have completely changed my motherhood for the better.
Here’s why: they provide a flexible framework for each day, week, month, season so that I can stop reinventing the wheel.
As mamas, planning, prepping and providing meals for our family is a huge part of our day to day life. So, I’ve done my very best to simplify the process as much as possible.
Here are a few ways I do that:
I make a meals idea list at the start of each week. I list seven breakfasts and seven dinner ideas based on what I have in the fridge and pantry. Generally it’s the same basic seasonal meals on rotation. I might throw in a new recipe now and then. If I do, I pull from my Food + Drink Board on Pinterest. This gives me the flexibility of choosing what I make on any given day, but I have the framework of “what” already laid out.
Lunches around here are almost always “board style.” Meaning: I grab a cutting board, pull out all the random odds and ends in the fridge and create a mix of healthy fats, protein, and carbs. Super simple. No plates. Everyone is happy.
I use a meal delivery service. I’ve been trying out Hungry Root for a week each month (not sponsored). I plan to use them more heavily during postpartum. I get a box with basic ingredients for 2-3 breakfasts, dinners and snacks, high quality ingredients that I would normally choose. It’s really helped simplify the whole meal process and takes a load off my “plate.” Ha.
I do my best to focus on simple, high quality ingredients. You can make a pasta with olive oil, olives, tomatoes, parm and Italian sausage taste like a $20 meal if you use really good ingredients. Even a salad tastes world class when made with simple, high quality ingredients. Don’t over think it. Buy what’s in seasons, buy local. Don’t get locked into the main course, side dishes, three hours of prep mentality.
5.) Capsule Wardrobes for All
Seriously. This has simplified my life in so many ways. And capsule wardrobes don’t have to mean only a certain number or items. Or all neutral. Or that you wear the same three things every day of the week. It can look however you need and want it to look.
For me, capsule wardrobes has significantly cut down on the amount of laundry we have for five people. They have cut down on decision fatigue because we only have what we love and actually wear.
I find my kids gravitate to the same few pieces just like I do. So capsule wardrobes just make so much sense.
I could talk about this topic all day long. Truly. If you’d like to listen to the podcast episode related to this blog post, hop over here.
Stocking a winter wellness arsenal does take a little bit of planning, but it’s well worth the effort IMO. I love knowing that I have the tools I need to care for my family year around (leave a comment if you’d like a separate post on that!), but especially in the cooler months when our immune systems might otherwise take a little hit from lack of sunshine, more time spent indoors and cold + flu season ramping up.
In this post, I’ll be sharing why I stock a winter wellness arsenal and then how I stock it – what I’m making, products I’m sourcing and resources I’m utilizing to prepare for the cooler months ahead.
Why
Having a fully stocked wellness arsenal allows me to support my family’s health on a daily basis, prevent (proactive care is key!) and – when necessary – effectively address many common illnesses from the comfort of home.
It’s empowering. And we should feel empowered in this area, mamas. We know our families best. We know our children best. And there are so many natural remedies that are powerful and effective – several that use ingredients you might already have in your pantry or fridge.
This is not a knock against doctors or modern medicine. Both have their necessary and needed place. But I personally believe that place is predominantly for acute care.
When it comes to supporting my family’s health on a daily basis through preventative care measures and offering support during illnesses that simply must run their course, I love that I am able to be confident and prepared. You can be, too, mama. No degree or license required.
How
I have slowly expanded my winter wellness arsenal over the last few years. As I’ve gathered knowledge and confidence and I’ve found what works best for my family. Disclaimer: Please don’t take anything I’m saying here as gospel. Do your own research. Find what works best for your family. Keep asking questions, searching for the answers and never stop learning.
This past January everyone in my little fam got a horrible strain of the flu. I have never been that sick before, except for maybe an intense sinus infection in my teen years. I was down for about a week and it took me a few more weeks to feel like myself again. Through that experience I was able to test my winter wellness arsenal and found some great things to add to it as well.
This year I’m trying several new-to-me remedies. I plan to give them a go and see which ones work best for us, then repeat the tried and trues next year and leave the rest.
4 Thieves Vinegar
Chamomile Tincture
Fermented Honey + Garlic
This is what I’m making to have on hand this year:
Quick note: most of the following recipes need to sit and “cure” for 4-6 weeks for best results. That’s why I talk about having to plan ahead a little bit. Starting now (late August/early September) will ensure you have what you need before the cooler weather hits.
Elderberry Syrup – An immune tonic that is full of flavonoids, potassium and Vitamin A and C. Easy to make and keeps well in the fridge. I give it as a preventative Oct-Mar a few times a week and up the dosage to twice a day at the first sign of illness. This is one remedy I’ve been using for a few years now and it is fantastic. I can personally attest to it’s benefits and will always have this in my winter wellness arsenal.
Fermented honey and garlic– A powerhouse duo! Both raw honey and garlic are superstars when it comes to immune support, prevention of illness and shortening the duration of an illness. This year is my first time making this combo, but I’ve been using both ingredients separately for years with great success.
Raw honey is soothing for sore throats while providing anti-viral anti-bacterial properties along with many amino acids, minerals, prebiotics and enzymes. If local raw honey is used, it’s also wonderful as an anti-allergen. It’s just an all around superfood.
Garlic is also anti-viral and anti-bacterial. It’s high in allicin which is produced when fresh garlic is crushed. This compound can prevent oxidative stress, may prevent some cancers and is an anti-inflammatory.
I plan to use this as needed for both prevention (if you don’t like the idea of eating it by the spoonful, I read it makes a tasty dressing or marinade) and during any bouts of illness. Overall, it was just super simple to make so I figured why not?!
Chamomile tincture – A gentle tonic that promotes relaxation, sleep, calms nerves and can assist with pain relief (think: teething and headaches). This one is new to me as well, although chamomile is not; I’ve been drinking the tea for a long time. And I just happened to have a big bag of loose, dried flowers so I thought I’d give this one a shot. I plan to use it in place of Tylenol whenever possible (saving that as a last resort).
Echinacea tincture + tea – A wonderful preventive and/or remedy that boosts the immune system, aids in respiratory issues, can reduce infections (think: ear infections and yeast infections), reduces inflammation and can provide pain relief.
I have used echinacea in both tincture and tea form for years, though more regularly as apart of my winter wellness arsenal beginning last year. I actually grew an echinacea plant this year (yay, me for keeping it alive! Ha) so I used fresh flowers and leaves/stems in my tincture. I dried a portion as well to crush and use for tea.
Echinacea is not recommended for long term/on going use. I only give it at the first sign of illnesses and try to taper off after a week, giving a break and then dosing again for a few days as needed.
4 Thieves Vinegar– Immune boosting and anti-microbial mutli-purpose tonic. This blend is super easy to make and can be taken for preventative care or immune system support at first sign of illness. This will be my first year using this, so I’m excited to see how it works.
I plan to dose similar to Elderberry Syrup, but probably only at first signs of illness. I’ve read to take it with raw honey as an added boost (will use my fermented garlic honey). This can also be used topically for skin irritations. As well as a surface disinfectant; just pour the strained liquid into an amber bottle with a spray top and use like an all-purpose cleaner. It’s worth a try!
Echinacea/Goldenseal tincture (a little left over from last year)
Sovereign Silver – I use this as a preventive immune boost, but also on cuts or skin irritations, rashes, etc. I’ve even read you can diffuse it, definitely trying that this winter. It’s just an all around awesome remedy to have on hand.
WishGarden “Get Over It” – found this during our flu bout in January when I was on my second week not feeling well. I think it really, really helped give me that extra “oomph” I needed to start feeling like myself again.
Essential oils (for diffusing and using topically): peppermint, eucalyptus, sweet orange
A month-by-month approach to stocking up.
I am taking a month-by-month approach to stocking up and I’m guessing that’s probably the best approach budget-wise for most mamas out there. While caring for our families doesn’t have to break the bank, it is an investment. I like taking it a little at a time. That allows me to reasonably fit it into our budget and also allows me time to consider what I really want and need.
A note on the month-by-month approach for 2020: I front loaded my most wanted items because it’s hard to know how supply and distribution lines will look in the coming months with the election craziness and any October surprises. That would be my only word of warning. When everything hit the fan in March many of the products and companies I’m going to share sold out very fast and were weeks behind in shipping.
Here’s what I’m planning to purchase over the next three months:
September
These immune gummies – we’re going to be traveling + these are so convenient. I also like to have them during the months when I’m not making elderberry syrup.
Some sort of electrolyte boost for travel and for any illnesses that may arise. I’m still researching to find the cleanest one out there.
Essential oils: lavender, cedar, clove bud, tea tree
More ginger, garlic, onions + lemons
October
Rocky Mountain throat syrup – this is another product I discovered during our January bout with the flu and it is the only natural cough syrup that really works IMO. One dose and my kiddos and I were able to sleep without hacking.
More ginger, garlic, onions, lemons and add fresh turmeric root
November
Glutathione – an awesome immune support, reduces oxidative stress, aids the liver, improves sleep, and helps with respiratory issues. I prefer to take the liposomal version.
Vitamin D3/K2 as needed
Orthomolecular Sinatrol – this is something new I want to have on hand this year because I’ve heard great things about it. From their company: “Helps support microflora balance, promotes normal mucus viscosity for healthy sinus function, and promotes a balanced inflammatory response.” I struggled with multiple sinus infections in my teens so I do my best to lower inflammation and support my sinus when I do get sick now.
Essential oils: lemon, cinnamon, cypress
More sovereign silver as needed
More fresh ginger, garlic, onions, lemons and fresh turmeric as needed
Never forget that food is medicine. And while genes are part of the equation, lifestyle largely determines how our genes express themselves. I would be remiss to not mention this point. I’m pretty sure if you’ve been around here long at all, you know I believe diet and lifestyle are the first line of defense when it comes to wellness. The food we are putting in our body, the products we’re putting on our body, etc, are paramount. We have to address those before natural remedies, supplements, and vitamins are going to do us any good.
Here are some of my current favorite resources that have helped me in building my winter wellness arsenal:
Books:
Rosemary Gladstar’s Medicinal Herbs: A Beginner’s Guide – this book kept rising to the top in all my research so I snagged it. And I’m so glad! It’s an easy read, but very detailed and helpful at the same time. I can tell it will be a book I reference for years to come.
Mommy Diagnostics (The Art of Taking Care of Your Family)– my midwife loans out her library and I just happened to grab this one. I’m so glad I did! It’s fantastic. Honestly, it’s really hard to find and super pricey. I found a copy for around $50 and snagged it because I really feel it’s just that good and a resource I will be returning to again and again. I wanted it on my shelf.
My Pinterest board Herbalism + Homeopathy – where I’m pinning all the winter wellness arsenal goodness. That’s were you’ll find all the recipes I return to again and again, as well as all the new ones I’m trying out.
Mary Ruth’s Organics – this company is one of my top choices when it comes to high quality supplements for my family.
iHerb – this is a new-to-me company and, so far, I love their selection. The minimum for free shipping is super low, shipping is fast and I haven’t had any problem with anything I’ve received. Ultimately, as convenient as Amazon is, I prefer to find alternate methods of purchasing wellness items, including going directly to the companies themselves.
Mountain Rose Herbs – one of my top resources for all things herbs, essential oils, natural remedies and other household supplies (think: beeswax candles). The only downside is they are 2-3 weeks behind in shipping so keep that in mind when ordering. I do love their sourcing and quality and will continue to purchase from them as needed.
There you have it, an overview of why + how I’m stocking our winter wellness arsenal this year. Has this post been helpful? If so, please pin and share and let me know in the comments!
Disclaimer: I am not a doctor. Everything health + wellness I share here is based on my own personal experience and research. Be your own advocate, mama. Search, ask, dig. Research and find the answers you need. You are worth it.
Today I want to talk about caring for our physical health in specific and holistic ways. Because how we care for our bodies affects how we care for our minds which affects how we care for our souls. It’s all connected.
The topic of caring for our bodies might immediately conjure up thoughts of $100 an hour massages or weekly pedicures or shopping sprees, that’s not what I want to talk about at all.
Now those things can have their place, but it’s my mission to redefine caring for ourselves. So that it’s accessible and applicable for every mama, everywhere. So, in this article I’m going to share ten ways we can care for our souls in consistent, tangible, life-changing ways. That don’t cost a lot of money or take a lot of time.
Let’s dive in…
1.) Don’t overthink eating well.
This topic can feel so loaded. Full of do’s and don’ts. Diet trends and 30 day plans. It can feel so overwhelming that we never even take the first step, or we do and quit soon after.
I have been there. Believe me. I’m a foodie so I’m not into all the restrictive eating and crazy diets. I love to look at eating well as a lifestyle. Not a restriction or a “30 days and done,” but the way that I live most of the time.
Because: I only get one life and one body and I want to be here to watch my babies grow up and have babies. I want to live to the fullest, be vibrant and full of energy way past the typical prime. That’s my WHY.
So, the big lesson I’ve learned? Don’t over think it. Keep it super simple, basic, just like whole foods. A few ingredients. High quality. Put them together and you have an amazing meal that fuels your body and brings healing to every cell.
This is going to look different for everyone, but one great place to start is committing to make a daily green smoothie. I usually make mine in the morning, but sometimes if I don’t get to it then, I fit it in for an afternoon pick me up.
Don’t know which recipe to try? Start with this one, this one or this one. So delicious, so simple and a great way to get whole foods into your body on a daily basis.
Once you’ve got the daily green smoothie habit down, start working on something else. Commit to drinking a warm glass of water with fresh lemon juice first thing in the morning. Commit to incorporating veggies into every meal. Make ingredient swaps like: coconut oil, olive oil, grassfed butter or ghee in place of standard vegetable oil or margin. Swap raw honey, pure maple syrup or coconut sugar for granulated sugar. Swap whole fat, organic, grassfed dairy or clean non-dairy options for conventional dairy products.
One step at a time. One habit at a time. A little goes a long way.
PS This is one of my favorite ladies to follow (her blog and insta are amazing!) for inspiration when it comes to eating well as a lifestyle.
2.) Switch to non-toxic personal care products.
We can’t under estimate the impact products make on our health. Especially when we use so many as women, just in a single day.
Switching out our skincare and makeup products for non-toxic options can go a long way in reducing our exposure to so many hormone and health disrupting chemicals.
Second: body lotion. Our skin is our biggest detox organ, let’s not suffocate it by slathering on chemicals. Switch it out for something completely natural like this oil or this body butter.
Third: skincare. The quality of my skin transformed so much when I traded in my conventional skincare products for non-toxic ones. Ones where I could read (and even eat!) every ingredient on the bottle. This is by far my favorite skincare company.This one is so amazing, too. I also love this one.
Fourth: makeup. This one can feel really overwhelming, especially if you’re used to a certain feel, result and quality in your makeup. And you shouldn’t have to sacrifice any of those while also putting non-toxic products on your skin. This is my favorite non-toxic makeup company. I also like this one and this one.
Fifth: hair care. This one was the hardest for me to switch out. Not going to lie. It’s really hard to find high quality, non-toxic hair care that actually works. But about a month ago, I came across this brand and I am sold. They don’t gum my hair up or weigh it down. They make my hair feel clean and fresh. But I also feel good about what I’m putting on my scalp. I love this, this and this product of theirs.
PS Check out this blog post for a full run down of all the skincare and makeup products I use on a daily basis.
Because heat ministers to the deepest parts of who we are. Think about a warm bath or sunshine, a cozy blanket or a crackling fire on a chilly day. A heatpack is that little bit of healing heat you can take with you wherever you go, whenever you need it most.
I warm mine for about 3 minutes in the microwave and tuck it into my covers to warm up the sheets while I’m getting ready for bed.
I also use it to warm up in the middle of the day when I have a chill. I’ll put it over my feet when I’m sitting on the couch watching a show in the evening.
I lay it over sore muscles when I need tension relief.
I use it between my legs or over my lower abdomen for cramping and period discomfort.
I use it across my chest for anxiety relief.
So many uses. Worth every penny. Go grab one – and pick a darling cover to go with it.
This can feel like another loaded topic. Along with eating well, we tend to overthink movement. Get sucked into all the trends, the do’s and don’ts.
It doesn’t have to be a punishment or an attempt to “even out the scales.” We have to look at moving our bodies as a way we honor them, honor ourselves. As a way we care for ourselves on the deepest level.
And we don’t need to put qualifications on movement. Or subscribe to one way and one way only.
Movement can look like:
a walk in the neighborhood with our kids
a yoga flow before bed
squats and pushups in the backyard while the kids play
a 15 minute HIIT work out
an hour at the gym if that’s what lights you up
a pilates class in person or online
dance cardio
tennis
swimming
So, let’s not overcomplicate it. Let’s not say it has to look one certain way. Let’s just move our bodies consistently. Because they’ve been so good to us and we want to be good to them.
PS If you need some inspo, here are a few of my favorite, free online workouts: HIIT, yoga and barre inspired.
5.) Find a doctor who is right for you.
This can be easier said than done. I know. But I also know that I’m the one who suffers most if I put off finding a good doctor. Now I go in for a well visit around 12 months postpartum after every baby. Even once we’re done having babies, I plan to go in every couple years to make sure that I am staying on top of my hormone health, my thyroid and any other issues that arise.
When we have nagging physical symptoms we can’t resolve, gosh, that can be so draining mentally and emotionally. I know it takes a lot of work to find a doctor and then go through all the appointments and procedures that may be needed. But it’s so worth it for our health, mama. Especially if we can be proactive and circumvent things from happening in the first place or at the very least from getting worst.
I wish I’d learned this lesson earlier. I might not have been diagnosed with borderline Hashimoto’s when I was pregnant with my third. Or had to wean my baby early so I could do intensive protocols for two major gut infections that were affecting my health. Take it from me.
PS I actually wrote a detailed blog post on this exact topic. You can check it out here. I cover how to find the right doctor, how to prep for your first appointment and several different tests you might want to ask for when you go.
6.) Optimize your sleep.
Whoo. I just keep hitting all these loaded topics, don’t I? Ha. I know sleep can be a touchy subject especially if you’re a mom of littles. Those early years are rough. And sleep is bound to be scarce or at the very least very disrupted. No doubt.
BUT. As a mom to three (almost four!), I’ve learned over the years several ways to optimize the sleep I do get. I’m not going to paint a picture of a 3 hour evening routine and 9 hours of sleeping bliss for you because I know that’s not reality. And would probably have you clicking away faster than I could say snooze.
Instead let me share with you bullet point style several ways to optimize the sleep you DO get. Whether it’s two hours or four or 7 hours broken into 30 minute increments.
Wear blue light blocking glasses after sunset
Drink 1/4 cup tart cherry juice in the afternoon (high in melatonin)
Shut off all screens an hour before bed
If you wake consistently around 2-3am try eating a small, protein heavy snack before bed (spoonful of almond butter)
Use black out blinds and/or a sleep mask
Keep your room cool
Use ear plugs if you can or least white noise
Go to bed and wake up at consistent times even on weekends
Remember that the most important hours when it comes to sleep benefits are between 10pm-2am. If at all possible, aim to be asleep during that time
As soon as you can after waking get into natural light or use a sunlight therapy lamp to reset your circadian rhythm
Add in a magnesium supplement. I love to take 400mg of magnesium glycinate before bed or use the Natural Calm powder if I need to get my bowels moving.
PS Sometimes you do need help getting the baby to sleep. I wish I could go back and do so many things different with my second. I was exhausted and overwhelmed at the time. But this I know – I could never (or should say would never) live through another season like that without trying several things first. Like taking this course on baby sleep and consistent chiropractic care for baby. Just to name two.
7.) Make sure you’re hydrating.
I think hydration is one of the most underrated aspects of caring for ourselves. It’s simple, straight forward, but often over looked or even forgotten. But we can make it fun! And comforting! And healing! And a sprinkle of sweet pauses through out our day. It’s all in how we approach it.
I cannot get enough yummy, healing drinks. Of course, some good, filtered water hits the spot most times. But I like to get a little creative and use my drinks to not only stay hydrated, but sneak in some good fats, protein and healing herbs whenever possible.
Above and beyond my 8 glasses of filtered water, I drink 2-3 healing drinks a day. I love a good, organic coffee, but I try to stay super light on the caffeine. Sometimes I make this dandelion tea. Or a golden milk latte. Or some of my favorite mushroom coffee. Any and all of these can be served piping hot or iced. You can also check out my Instagram highlights where I share all my favorite coffee substitutions.
PS I have two great resources for you on this topic:
Incorporating a detox bath into my self-care routine is one of my favorite things to do. I take one 2-3 times per week. It’s calming, healing and relaxing. A good detox bath is just what the doctor ordered any time of year, but especially when our detox and immune systems need that extra boost.
PS Detox in general is so important. And something our body is doing on a daily basis whether we realize it or not. But if we can jump in and support it in its natural processes, so much the better. Other ways to do this?
Infrared sauna
Sweating it out through movement
Dry brushing
Staying hydrated with lemon water or dandelion root tea
Lessoning the burden on our livers by cutting down on caffeine, alcohol and sugar consumption.
9.) Add in Some Supplements
My number one priority is always to focus on eating whole foods that support my body and my health in all the ways. But when and where I need some extra support, I like to have these supplements on hand:
Collagen. I add this right into my daily smoothie.
Zinc. Proper zinc levels help support the immune system, skin health and so many other processes in the body.
Vitamin D3 drops. To help keep my levels optimal when I can’t get as much sun (I usually supplement October – April). If you’re not sure what your Vitamin D Levels are, have your preferred practitioner check them.
A methylated B-Complex. I take this only in the morning otherwise it can tend to disrupt my sleep.
Magnesium. I take 400mg of magnesium glycinate every night before bed.
Elderberry. The QUEEN of preventative measures. Especially in the cooler months. You can even make your own. Here’s the recipe I use.
10.) Create Your Own Self-Care Routine
Grab a piece of paper and a pen. Don’t worry – this is going to be fun!
Make three sections: Morning, Mid-Day and Evening.
Write down: the time you usually wake up and then list the things that help you start the day off right.
Do the same for Mid-Day: the time you usually eat lunch and the things that give you a little pick-me-up (if you’re a mom, you can focus this middle section around nap time like I do).
Do the same thing for the Evening section. Now you’re done. This is the outline for your self-care routine.
Take it for a spin tomorrow and see how it goes. It will take a little trial and error, but you’ll figure out a routine that works for you. Yoiu might always do everything on your list every day. It might shift and change with the seasons. But you’ll have a framework to use, to refer to, to make sure you are caring for yourself in consistent, tangible, life-changing ways.
Here’s an example of my morning self-care routine to get you started:
Wake up at 7am
Do my skin care routine
Drink a glass of water
Spend a few minutes in the Word + prayer
Get dressed
Do my hair + makeup
Make my bed and tidy my room + bathroom
Drink a green smoothie + eat a high protein/high fiber breakfast
Do the most important thing on my to do list
PS I wrote a full blog post on creating your own self-care rhythms. Check it out here!
This list is by no means exhaustive. Have anything to add? Let me know in the comments!
Aslo, have any questions for me? Leave them in the comments, too, and I’ll be happy to answer! You’ve got this, mama. Never fear! One breath, one step, one day at a time.
For more self-care goodness, come join me on Instagram. And if you haven’t joined my email list yet, that’s a great place to find more of the same. Check out the side bar (or scroll all the way down if you’re on mobile) to view all the freebies I’ve created just with you in mind. I hope you find something helpful.
Let’s care for ourselves,
Hannah
Disclaimer: I am not a doctor. Everything health + wellness I share here is based on my own personal experience and research. Be your own advocate, mama. Search, ask, dig. Research and find the answers you need. You are worth it.
A while back on Instagram stories, I put up a poll asking if people struggled with knowing how to care for their minds. A majority said yes.
So, here I am to talk about caring for our mental health in specific and holistic ways. Because how we care for our minds affects how we care for our souls which affects how we care for our bodies. It’s all connected.
And even though caring for our minds can seem rather nebulous and elusive, it’s extremely important. And probably a lot more simple than we even realize. In this article I’m going to share ten ways we can care for our minds.
Let’s dive in…
1.) Do a social media detox.
Let’s start with the big hitters first. There’s no reason to beat around the bush. We live in a day and age when we are bombarded 24/7 with information. Non-stop news. Non-stop pings. Non-stop notifications. Non-stop. Of course this is going to affect our mental health.
Also, our social circles have exploded. They used to contain only immediate family and close friends with maybe a handful of distant relatives or acquaintances. Now with social media we are literally invited into intimate moments of peoples’ lives whom we’ve never met, will never meet. One minute you’re scrolling through the Explore tab on Instagram and the next minute you’re crying reading someone’s post about how their child just died of a brain tumor. We were not meant to carry the scope of burdens we carry.
This doesn’t even cover the struggle with comparison, remaining authentic, being present in our off-screen lives… Perhaps another blog post for another time? Yes, and here it is if you’d like to read it.
So let’s detox. Regularly. Delete the apps. Put the phone in airplane mode. Better yet, just turn it off. Unplug. Let it rest. It will be there tomorrow, a week from now, a month from now. Heck, what did we do before social media? We lived our lives, but with a whole lot less stress and mental overwhelm. Social media can be an amazing tool…when it’s used appropriately. Let’s use it but with firm boundaries.
TRY:designating a day or two a week where you are totally social media free. Maybe even take a longer sabbatical, like a week or two every quarter. See where it leads you. At the very least: turn off your notifications.
I can’t talk about mental health with out talking about this. Yes, it’s hard. Yes, it sucks. At first. Maybe for a long time. It’s not easy to give up our crutches, especially our mental ones. But it needs to be said: over consumption of sugar, alcohol, gluten and conventional dairy in particular are detrimental to our mental health. They contribute to so many diseases and cause inflammation to run rampant in the body.
I wouldn’t ask you to do anything I haven’t done. I did a strict elimination diet last May and June. I cut out sugar, alcohol, gluten and dairy (plus a few other foods I discovered I was sensitive to) for 60 days. It wasn’t easy, but I felt immeasurably better. I don’t advocate elimination diets for the long term; I definitely feel like the mental health benefits start to wane around the 60 day mark, simply because restriction can mess with your head.
But that elimination diet helped me see how good I could feel without all the junk. And I eat some of the items I cut out now sparingly, in moderate amounts, on special occasions. I don’t feel deprived, in fact, I feel free knowing that I’m caring for my body so I can feel my best.
I’m currently back to cutting gluten out entirely. I feel it’s what is best for me in this season, to support my body and promote deeper healing. Anyways, that’s a little bit of my journey just so you know I’m not just spouting off things you should do without the actions to back them up. I’m with you, mama. You’re not alone.
TRY: an elimination diet. Give up sugar, alcohol, gluten and dairy for at least 30 days, 60 days if you’re brave. See how you feel. It’s possible you might have more mental clarity than you’ve had in years.
I was totally burned out after I finished my masters degree. I read so many books. I wrote so many words. Then I met my husband and our whirlwind fairy-tale began. A little over a year later we welcomed our first child and then…life. It can get away from you if you’re not intentional.
What I’m proposing is to be active with your learning. Intentional. Focused. Make a list of your interests, passions, the subjects that really light you up. It can be anything. Remember: we’re not in school any more. Anything goes. There’s no failure or grades or task lists. Learn for the sheer love of learning. And when I say be active, I mean don’t be passive only. Because I believe we’re all learning all the time. Learning is something that comes naturally to us as human beings. But we can get burned out, distracted, overwhelmed, busy with life and we make the excuse that we just don’t have the time. But we do. We just have to carve it out. Be willing to actively learn. This will go so far when it comes to caring for our minds. What we put in is what we get out.
TRY: keeping a running list of books you want to read, courses you want to take, areas of interest you want to study. Get a library card, sign up for Audible, download podcast episodes so they’re ready to go. Create learning rhythms in your days: i.e. Tuesday evening is screen-free and you curl up with a book and a warm drink… or Saturday you steal away to a coffee shop to listen to a podcast or work on a course in something that interests you. Take it as far as you want to go.
Let’s break this down so it doesn’t sound so “pie in the sky” as it always has for me. Especially if you’re a mom of little ones and you feel like your head is about to explode most of the time. Like HOW can I possibly practice being anymore present. I’m needed 24\7 and I just want to escape. I get it. I live it, too. Motherhood is the hardest and best thing I’ve ever done.
But I’ve realized that my mental health depends on being mindfully aware of the present moment. Here are some specific ways I’m working towards that goal:
Limiting social media and screens in general
Practicing yoga daily
Accepting help so that I have more mental space to be present
Learning how to breathe more deeply and fully
Meditation
Journaling my prayers
Keeping a gratitude list
Establishing key rhythms that anchor my days and weeks
TRY: any or all of the above. But also try making space and some time to sit down and really get honest with yourself: what do you need personally to feel more present in your life? Write down your answers and then take action. Everyone’s journey will be different.
This is such a useful tool. I love to do this before bed, but really anytime that I am feeling overwhelmed. It’s just what it sounds like: I dump all the stuff that is swirling around in my brain out on a piece of paper or the notes app in my phone. When I see it all in black and white what I thought were big things look smaller and sometimes the seemingly smaller things jump out at me and I realize they need to be made priority.
TRY: grabbing a piece of paper or a notebook, a pen and a few minutes of quiet. Write down anything and everything that comes to mind, no matter how little or insignificant it seems. Clear it all out of your brain. Once it’s on paper, you can see it for what it is. Then you can prioritize or scratch it out or just let it be. Let it go.
Few things have done more for my mental health than learning how to set boundaries. It’s not easy. It can be really hard and heart breaking. And it doesn’t come over night, it takes time and it’s really a life-long journey. But boundaries are essential to mental health. I went through an intense season after my second baby was born where everything came to a head. I struggled with being anxious, irritable, frazzled, depressed and angry… the truth is I still do at times because that’s life and we live in a broken world. But learning how to set boundaries has eased those things considerably. It’s made my confidence and peace soar. It’s been a game changer.
Here’s the truth, mama: you can’t be all things to all people all of the time. Something has to give. And if it’s always you, you’re going to burn out and end up resenting yourself and those you love most. And that’s no good for anyone.
TRY: identifying a problem area in your life, identify your limits in that area and then setting clear boundaries based on those limits. I wrote a whole blog post on this topic and you can read more here.
They say that physical clutter is mental clutter, and I have found that to be very true. Maybe you have, too, mama? When my physical surroundings are chaotic, so is my mind. And when I can’t control all of the chaos, it certainly helps that I can control the amount of clutter in my life. We get to decide, mama, what stays and what goes. What is serving us, what we love and use and need, and what we don’t.
It is simply amazing to me how decluttering a physical space in my home or decluttering my phone apps or camera roll or people I follow on social media or bookmarks on my browser or events on my schedule or tasks on my to-do list instantly lightens my mental load as well.
If you feel the need to de-clutter your whole house, have at it. But if you don’t know where to start or want to start slow, start with the pain points, the trouble spots.
A few examples:
The mudroom/laundry room situation.
The kitchen cabinets.
The bathroom vanity.
The car.
Your closet.
The kiddos’ toys.
TRY: picking a trouble spot, setting the timer for 20 minutes and decluttering your heart out. Have three bags: throw away, give away and sell. When you’re done with your trouble spot or the timer goes off, take the three bags and do what you need to do with them: dump it in the trash can, put it in the donation box, or take pictures and list to sell.
Do you ever feel like your brain is on fire and you need some fresh air just to cool it off? Just me? Ha. Simply getting outside for 5-10 minutes makes such a difference in my mental health. It doesn’t have to be anything complicated, just stepping outside barefoot on the ground and taking some deep breaths helps so much. Sometimes I’m able to hike a local trail. Sometimes it’s a walk in the neighborhood. In the summer, we try to fit in several camping adventures or longer day hikes. In the winter, we bundle up to walk around the backyard or sit in a sunny window.
Any little bit helps. It helps me re-frame, reset. Just getting fresh air in my lungs can rejuvenate me, get me out of my own head and more into my body. Nature is an amazing thing.
TRY: going for a walk, doing some stretches outside while the kiddos play, laying on a blanket in the yard, sitting in a sunny window with a good book, planning a hike in a local nature preserve or – go big or go home – a trip to a sunny, outdoorsy destination like Glacier National Park.
In our modern society almost everything we do revolves around some sort of screen or another. Which is amazing progress, some of it absolute magic, like FaceTiming loved ones who are far away. But screens can also steal our mental peace if we let them and even cause physical symptoms like headaches, eye strain, disrupted sleep from blue light exposure or disrupted cell function from EMF exposure. Just to name a few.
It’s refreshing and healing for our minds to do something that doesn’t involve a screen. Like journaling in an actual notebook with a pen. Writing a snail mail letter to a friend. Flipping through a magazine in the bath. Reading a hard copy book in bed at night. Let’s give our brains a break from over stimulation by giving the screens a rest.
TRY: any of the above. Also, try designating screen-free times in your days or weeks. i.e. no screens before you’ve done your morning rhythms or no screens two hours before bed. Maybe you do a screen-free evening a week where you read books, play games or talk instead.
Relieve some of your mental load, mama. We do so much every day. It’s good and it’s beautiful, but it’s also hard and exhausting. There is nothing wrong with removing some of the burdens, delegating some of the tasks, outsourcing jobs or automating shipments of things you need and use all the time.
Every season is going to look different. Some seasons you’ll have more margin and energy and others will lean super heavy on the automation and outsourcing. And that’s okay. The important thing to remember is this: you were not meant to operate beyond a certain mental capacity without relief. When we’re over-extended and over-whelmed and over-worked all of the time, it will eventually lead to a break down.
So, accept the help, mama, but if the offers don’t come, go out and get it. Ask for it. Hire it. Pay for it. Because your mental health is worth every penny.
TRY: looking at your to do list and determining if anything can be outsourced or automated. Think about: having your groceries delivered, a meal service to deliver ready-made meals or meal kits to cover a couple nights a week, subscriptions to items you routinely purchase and need, a house cleaner to do a monthly deep clean, or automating all your bill pay.
For more self-care goodness, come join me on Instagram. And if you haven’t joined my email list yet, that’s a great place to find more of the same. Check out the side bar (or scroll all the way down if you’re on mobile) to view all the freebies I’ve created just with you in mind. I hope you find something helpful.
Let’s care for ourselves,
Hannah
Disclaimer: I am not a doctor. Everything health + wellness I share here is based on my own personal experience and research. Be your own advocate, mama. Search, ask, dig. Research and find the answers you need. You are worth it.
Today I want to talk about caring for our spiritual health in specific and holistic ways. Because how we care for our souls affects how we care for our minds which affects how we care for our bodies. It’s all connected.
And even though caring for our souls can seem a little woowoo or “out there,” it’s everything. So I want to try and make it accessible and applicable to every mama, everywhere. In this article I’m going to share ten ways we can care for our souls in consistent, tangible, life-changing ways.
Disclaimer: I’m coming from a specific worldview in this article. I am a born-again believer in Jesus Christ. I have a personal relationship with Him. I believe that He died on the cross for my sins and the sins of everyone who has ever or will ever exist, that all we have to do is accept that free gift in order to be saved, that He was buried and that He rose again three days later. I believe I can speak to Him anywhere, anytime without anyone else mediating. I believe that every word in the Bible is infallible truth. And I believe that when I die, I’m going to be instantly present with Jesus.
Let’s dive in…
1.) Immerse yourself in truth on a daily basis.
In our modern world we are bombarded day in an day out with bad news. Truly. It almost feels inescapable sometimes. We certainly can’t control all of it unless we want to live in a bubble, but we can control a lot of it.
We can choose who we follow on social media platforms.
We can choose what shows and movies we watch.
We can choose whether or not we tune into the news.
We have a lot of choice in the matter. Bottom line. We may not be able to control anyone or anything else, but we are in control of ourselves.
So how do we immerse ourselves in truth on a daily basis? The number one way I do this is by reading the Bible every day. Almost always first thing in the morning before I leave my room. Some days I only have a few minutes, some days longer. Some days I read a chapter or part of a chapter, but I almost always try to read at least one verse that can go with me into my day.
I start by letting truth in, than I move through my day intentionally keeping the lies out. I don’t watch or read the news. I don’t follow people on social media who don’t speak the truth or lift me up. If I feel doubts or fears creep in, I ask for God’s protection. I’m not always as quick as I should be to recognize spiritual attacks, but I’ve learned a lot over the years and am better able to spot the tell tale signs.
I finish every day by praying physical, mental and emotional protection over myself and my family. I literally pray for God to send His warrior angels to guard us as we sleep.
TRY: Making it a point to read a verse or a chapter before even getting out of bed. Pick a book of the Bible to work through verse by verse, download the YouVersion app and choose a Bible study to read through, check out SheReadsTruth and use one of their studies (it’s free to read online and you can even have it automatically emailed to you each day). Pray through out the day, pray for protection, be specific – pray that the lies of the Enemy would be silenced and that truth would reign in your heart. Unfollow people you need to unfollow, turn off the news, be the gate keeper of your mind.
2.) Practice gratitude.
There is a whole lot of rough stuff happening in the world right now. Which is to be expected because we live in a broken world and this is not our home. So much difficulty and hardship and unknowns and pain and suffering and spiritual oppression. It’s real.
So, I’m not telling you to play Pollyanna and sweep all that under the rug, live in denial. I am telling you that practicing gratitude on a regular basis transforms our perspective.
I know it’s been true in my life. When I have felt weighed down by everything around me, naming my gratitude instantly shifts my soul.
My favorite way to practice gratitude is to list five things I’m thankful for each day before I get out of bed. Just five. You could even do this right before bed. Or at both times.
TRY: listing 5 things you’re thankful for each day. You can make it a mental list or you can start a gratitude journal that you add to each day. Find an empty journal and keep it by your bedside. Make it a habit to find those 5 things and I promise you it will bring lightness to your days and your soul.
3.) Harness the power of truth-filled affirmations.
I was pregnant with my third baby, my husband was in Seattle trying to sell our house that wouldn’t sell, I was with our two kids living with my parents in Oklahoma while we were waiting. There were so many unknowns. Fears. I hate being separated from my husband. And, as grateful as I was for my parents’ help during that season, it was really hard to be without a home. In-between. In limbo.
In the midst of everything, I remember praying consistently like I hadn’t prayed in a long time. And I also started writing out truth-filled affirmations that I spoke over myself and my family every day. These were like prayers but spoken as statements of faith.
Do you want to know something? Every single affirmation I wrote on that list became reality. And many of them were HUGE, felt seemingly impossible. Which still blows my mind. I am so grateful that I chose to harness the power of speaking truth-filled affirmations in that season.
TRY: Writing down a list of 3-5 truth-filled affirmations. An example from my list during that season: “We will sell our house at the perfect time for more than we ever thought possible.” Keep the affirmations somewhere you will see them every day. Make time, even just a minute, to read through them out loud. Out loud makes a difference. I know it sounds silly, but the spoken word has power.
4.) Meditate on Scripture.
Tying into the first point because it’s that important. What we fill our minds with will affect the state of our souls. We have to keep the truth front and center.
This is why I like reading my Bible first thing in the morning. Usually at least one verse or a part of a verse will jump out at me. It’s a piece of truth I can take with me into my day.
I’ll either write it down at the top of my to do list or simply call it to mind periodically. Either way, I’m intentionally taking truth into my day and keeping it at the forefront of my mind. On the days I do this, the impact on my soul health is huge.
TRY: Asking the Holy Spirit to show you truth when you’re reading the Bible. Take that piece of truth with you into your day. Create a lock screen for your phone, write it on your to do list, jot it down on an old-fashioned index card and keep it where you will see it often.
5.) Make time to dream without limits.
It might feel silly at first, but remember how natural it felt as a kid? To daydream. Let your imagination run wild. To think about all the things you wanted to do without coming up with reasons why you couldn’t.
Do more of that. Tap into your inner child. Don’t make excuses. Don’t over think it. Just let yourself dream. This is so vital to the health of our souls. God wouldn’t create us with the capacity to dream if He didn’t intend us to utilize that capacity our whole life long.
TRY: Making space to sit and dream. Grab a notebook and a pen. Or your laptop. Even the notes app on your phone. Just sit and dream. Where do you want to go? What do you want to do? Write down three things you would do if money and time were not an object. Start there. Let yourself dream without any qualifications.
6.) Declutter anything that holds you down.
And I do mean anything. In an area of your life. But certainly just plain, old stuff that piles up in drawers and on counters and in corners and under beds weighs us down. It might not seem like it would have an affect on our spiritual state, but it most definitely does. Physical clutter translates to mental clutter translates to emotional clutter translates to soul clutter.
It’s helpful to identify which areas in your home need to be decluttered the most. Which are your biggest pain points? Start with one of those. Set the timer for 20 minutes and declutter. Have a bin for trash, one for giveaway and one for selling (if that’s you’re thing). You might also have a bin for things you need to store. When the timer goes off, take care of everything you decluttered. Do what needs to be done so it doesn’t migrate back to where it came from.
TRY: having a 20 minute decluttering session once a day or even once a week until you’ve hit all the pain points you listed. Take care of everything you declutter right away so it doesn’t migrate back to where it came from. You will feel your motivation grow as you see the results that come from decluttering things that have been holding you down.
7.) Make time to be alone.
I used to resist this. I was afraid to be alone with my own thoughts. It just felt safer to keep going, keep pushing, keeping moving. Then to stop and actually have to face anything that might be impacting me.
But our soul health suffers when we don’t regularly make time to be alone. With ourselves and God. Just there, with no agenda, but to listen or share with Him what’s on our hearts. To breathe in the silence, let our minds rest.
The demands on our souls in this present age is huge. I’m not sure if you’ve felt it, but I have felt a dramatic increase in the spiritual realm over the last few months. It’s palpable and it’s a lot. Add to that just being a human…and then a wife and a mom. So, dealing with other souls on top of my own and all the spiritual “noise” that feels like it’s screaming at me right now.
I need time alone. So do you, mama. Just to be able to think, to process, to cry, to release…whatever it maybe. Don’t be afraid of being alone.
TRY: setting aside a few minutes every day to sit with yourself. To be alone. Bring a journal and a pen. Bring nothing. But bring yourself and do what helps the most. Sitting quietly, expressing any fears or worries, writing out some goals or dreams or prayers. Speaking your affirmations again. Perhaps you need more than a few minutes? Take the car and drive to a sunny spot and just soak up the silence. It doesn’t have to be fancy. A little goes a long way.
8.) Change your scenery.
Whatever this means to you, make it happen. Have an itch to rearrange your bedroom furniture? Your living room? Maybe clear out a closet to make yourself a mini-office?
Or maybe you just need to hop in the car and take a drive, a day trip? Even an over night. Grab your people, all the road snacks, and go somewhere you’ve never been.
Change your scenery. Serve dinner picnic-style on the living room floor. Set up a sheet and projector and watch a movie under the stars. Anything that moves you out of the rut, the mundane and into a new, fresh space. It doesn’t have to cost a lot of money, but it will certainly breathe life into your soul.
TRY: Any or all of the above. Switch up a room, art on the wall or even how you’ve organized a drawer (it’s good for your brain to get out of autopilot, too!). Research local day trips, find any body of water, pack a picnic and spend the day exploring. Let your imagination lead you.
9.) Be content with what you have + where you are.
Being content isn’t necessarily a trendy topic. It sounds pretty unapproachable and goody-two-shoes. But an amazing thing happens in our souls when we decide to love what we have, right where we are.
Because it is a choice. OUR choice. To stop being consumed with wanting, craving what we don’t have, imagining we were somewhere else other than where we are in this moment. It’s not easy to sit with unfilled desires, to lean into unmet needs or embrace the ache of missing something/somewhere we want.
But learning to be content even (and especially) in the difficult times, the sad times, the hard times fortifies our souls in ways that instant gratification never could. We were never meant to live perfectly fulfilled lives with every need met right when we ask – not here on this earth. That ache reminds us this is not our home.
TRY: naming your discontent when it arises, journal it out, physically open your hands and give it to God. He knows our every need, our every desire. He is good and gracious and gives us only what is very best. Refer to #2: list out all of the things in your life that you are currently grateful for, anything and everything. Naming our blessings snuffs out discontent.
10.) Don’t forget to breathe.
I went years holding my breath. Not always literally…but, yes, sometimes. I would hold it for several seconds at a time without realizing it. When I was stressed, when I was concentrating, when I wasn’t feeling good.
It took me years to learn how to breathe. I’m still learning. To breathe in, breathe out. To let go of what I can’t control.
Breathe with me, mama. Deeply. In through your nose for a count of 4. 1-2-3-4. Hold at the top for 3. 1-2-3. And out through your mouth for a count of 6. 1-2-3-4-5-6.
Repeat when necessary, as many times as necessary. Breathe in peace, breathe out peace. Breathe in joy, breathe out joy. Breathe in love, breathe out love. Keep it going now…
TRY: practicing some deep breathing before you get out of bed, whenever you feel stressed or overwhelmed, in your bath or shower, before you lay your head on the pillow at night. It doesn’t just affect your physical body. It calms your mind and delivers spiritual oxygen straight to your soul.
Have any questions for me? Leave them in the comments and I’ll be happy to answer! You’ve got this, mama. Never fear! One breath, one step, one day at a time.
For more self-care goodness, come join me on Instagram. And if you haven’t joined my email list yet, that’s a great place to find more of the same. Check out the side bar (or scroll all the way down if you’re on mobile) to view all the freebies I’ve created just with you in mind. I hope you find something helpful.
It’s about time I wrote this post. Something fun + light that also happens to be steeped in #soulmindbodyselfcare. Who doesn’t want or need more of that, right? I know I do.
Even if all you have is 10 minutes, this is for you. Heck, even if all you have is 2 minutes, this is for you. A little goes a long way.
I am not a makeup or skincare professional by any means. In fact, most days, although I always practice my skincare routine, I often skip makeup. But, maybe it’s everything currently going on in the world or being in the trenches of the first trimester, lately I’ve been craving the color and definition makeup provides on a more regular basis.
The bottom line: whatever makes you feel cared for, tends to your needs, and brings out your truest self – do more of those things.
For me that means a morning and evening skincare routine that usually takes me about five minutes each. The evening skincare routine I’m going to be sharing here is my longer, 10 minute routine that includes removing makeup, exfoliating and a simple gua sha flow.
It also means makeup when the mood strikes. Some days that means a little blush on my eyelids and cheeks, concealer under my eyes, curling my eyelashes and swiping on some lip balm. Somedays it means adding tinted moisturizer, mascara and brows to that. Somedays it means the full routine: primer, eyeshadow, eyeliner and color on my lips, too.
I want to show you what I do, so let’s dive in…
My 10 Minute Daytime Makeup Routine
This routine is quick + simple. I’m going to break it down by 2 minutes, 5 minutes and 10 minutes and then you can choose your own adventure. I’m going to list everything I use and I also have a video of my full routine linked for you so be sure to check that out.
2 Minutes
This is my daily go-to. If I only have a couple minutes or I just don’t feel like wearing much makeup but I still want to feel put together. I put concealer under my eyes, swipe blush on the center of my eyelids and on my cheek bones. Then I curl my eyelashes and add some balm to keep them curled + enhance my natural color. For a final touch, I swipe on some of my favorite lip [everything] balm.
5 Minutes
When you’re feeling like a little bit more. Before I start, I’ll mix some tinted moisturizer in with my face cream to create a nice base. It’s not high coverage, just enough, and it never feels cakey. I do my two minute routine, but add a couple coats of mascara instead of the balm and also swipe on some tinted brow gel to set + shape + fill them in a bit. A little goes a long way.
10 minutes:
This is the full routine. I never do more than this. Once in my life I’ve worn fake eyelashes [and it wasn’t even my wedding day, go figure, ha]. I’m not fancy, but this 10 minute routine is fancy for me. Just the right amount. For a date night or special event or just an average day at home when I feel like dolling up a little.
After the tinted moisturizer and before mascara, I put some primer on my eyelids, then shadow – usually a light color all over + up to my brow, a pinkish tone on my lid + a darker color in the corners to create depth. Then eyeliner with a mini cat wing if you’re brave [I’m not very often] and a color on top of my lip balm.
W3llPeople Bio Tint Multi-action Moisturizer with SPF 30 W3llPeople Bio Correct Multi-Action Concealer W3llPeople Brow Gel Expressionist W3llPeople Expressionist Liquid Eyeliner W3llPeople Expressionist Mascara W3llPeople Nudist Multi-Use Cream in Nude Berry
My 10 Minute Evening Skincare Routine
Skincare is very important to me. I really believe that healthy skin is the best foundation for natural beauty. It elevates everything. When we’re taking care of our skin, makeup is allowed to enhance instead of acting like a mask.
I’m going to share my full-length evening skincare routine. I don’t do all these steps or use all these products every single night. I’ll break it down like I did for my makeup routine.
My Routine
First, I remove makeup if I’m wearing it. I like to take most of it off with my makeup eraser cloth and/or use the oil cleansing method.
Second, I exfoliate once or twice a week (if not more).
Third, I restore my skin’s PH balance by using a toner.
Fourth, I smooth on an oil or serum and do my Gua Sha routine.
Finally, I finish with a healing balm to seal in all the moisture overnight and also swipe some on my lips.
Have any questions for me? Leave them in the comments and I’ll be happy to answer! You’ve got this, mama.
For more self-care goodness, come join me on Instagram. And if you haven’t joined my email list yet, that’s a great place to find more of the same. Also, check out the side bar (or scroll all the way down if you’re on mobile) to view all the freebies I’ve created just with you in mind. I hope you find something helpful.
